Sex Education
by WritingHealstheHeart
Summary: Spencer is embarrassed by his lack of sexual experience. Emily offers to help. Will the be the best idea they've ever come up with or will it ruin everything they had as friends/co-workers? PWP
1. Chapter 1

_This idea came to mind one night when I should have been sleeping, but kept tossing and turning. It will contain a lot of sex, varying in intensity. If you don't like those types of stories, please don't read it. This is rated M for a reason and I won't put warnings out for every chapter._

 _Please review and thanks for reading! Xoxo_

 _*Also, I will be finishing my other story – so don't worry*_

(xxxxx)

Jennifer Jareau, Emily Prentiss, and Penelope Garcia stood around Derek Morgan's desk listening to him regale them with stories of his weekend 'sex'capades, as he referred to them. As usual Spencer sat quietly at his desk listening and feeling incredibly insecure.

The girls were laughing and making jokes, while Derek continued to throw out innuendoes. Typically, Spencer listened to conversations, rarely joining in anyway, but anytime the conversation turned to sex he really tried to become invisible.

"Reid, come on man. Back me up here. Sex is way better than oral," Derek called, interrupting Spencer's thoughts.

"Huh?" he said looking towards the group staring at him.

"The girls think oral is better, but I disagree. I think sex is way better. It's more intimate and you both are being pleasured," Derek explained.

"No way! Half the guys I've ever been with it's like a race to the finish line for themselves. They don't care if I orgasm. They only care if they do and God forbid they don't finish for some reason. They become complete assholes," Emily said as Penelope nodded.

"You are just sleeping with the wrong men. You chose assholes. If you'd find someone like me, it would be a way better experience," Derek said.

"I'm telling you, oral is immensely better. It's all about you and your pleasure," Emily insisted, as J.J. and Penelope nodded this time.

"Reid, any time now," Derek said looking to his friend.

"To each their own," he said standing up. "I'm going to go get some more coffee. Anyone want any?"

They shook their heads no and went back to the conversation. Spencer sulked off to the kitchen where he began pouring himself a cup of coffee. He was so zoned out in thought he didn't hear Emily following him.

"You ok?"

Spencer jumped a bit, but gave her a smile.

"Oh … uh … yea, I'm fine," he said as he poured way too much sugar into his drink.

"You know you don't have to feel pressured to share your encounters. Derek thinks because he's vocal about it, everyone should be," she said with a smile.

Spencer nodded, but didn't look at Emily. He continued stirring his coffee, even though it was more than sufficiently stirred. Emily frowned.

"Spence, talk to me. What's going on?" she asked concerned.

"Nothing, I'm fine," he said again.

"I am not just a profiler, but your best friend. I can clearly see that something is upsetting you. You can talk to me. I won't tell anyone," she assured him.

She could see him considering her words. He seemed to debate whether or not to be honest with her. He opened his mouth, then closed it again. He stared at his drink before taking a deep breath.

"I don't really understand what Morgan is saying," he said softly.

"What do you mean?" Emily said furrowing her brow in confusion.

Spencer seemed to grow agitated and embarrassed.

"Emily, I don't join those conversations because I don't have anything to share," he said glancing at her before looking back down at his drink.

"I told you, you don't have to feel pressured to share," she started.

"No, it's not that I don't want to share, it's that I can't share because I don't have anything to share," he said trying not to come right out and say the truth.

Emily considered his words. It hit her what he meant and her eyes widened a bit in surprise.

"Are you still a virgin?" she asked quietly.

"No. I had sex before. I just haven't since then and it was a long time ago and it was awkward and horrible and not at all like the stories Morgan shares," Spencer said as he ran his fingers through his newly cut short hair.

"First of all, nobody has stories like Morgan," Emily said with a hint of humor. "Second, there's nothing to be ashamed of."

"Of course, there is!" he said raising his voice. He looked around and dropped his tone. "I don't have a clue what I am doing and so I avoid it. It's why nobody wants to date me. Lila tried, Austen tried, and a few others, but I can't go through with it. I'm just a bumbling, clueless idiot," he said as he plopped down into a chair.

Emily sighed and sat down across from him.

"Spencer, nobody is born knowing how to have sex. It's just something you learn the more you practice and it's different with everyone. As you can see from our debate, some people like sex, some like oral. It's supposed to be fun," she said.

"How can I have fun when I'm terrified of making myself look like a fool?" he said angrily.

"You just need to practice, Spence. Eventually you will find what works for you and you'll feel more confident," Emily assured him.

"And where exactly am I going to practice this? It's not like any girls are knocking down my door," he grumbled.

"You would have girls knocking down your door if you weren't hiding all the time. You have no idea how gorgeous you are. You know Derek teases you about being a pretty boy because you look like a model?" Spencer made a face. "I'm serious. You just think everyone sees this nerdy FBI agent, but that's only because you put that persona out there.

If you knew how many girls check you out, but move on when you show no sign of interest, you'd be shocked. You are brilliant and beautiful and you have the greatest heart. Any woman would be lucky to have you. You just need to start believing that," Emily said.

Spencer thought through her words.

"I just … I don't know how I'll ever get past the fact that at 29 year's old, I have no understanding of sex other than what's taught in books," he said sadly.

"You just need different books," Emily teased.

Spencer gave her a half smile and looked back down at his shoes. Emily wanted so badly to help him. To make him feel more confident and relaxed about sex. Suddenly, she got an idea. It seemed a bit crazy, but she truly thought it might help.

"I have an idea, but you need to hear me out before you say anything," she said.

"Ok."

"What if you had a way to learn about sex in a safe environment with no judgement or humiliation?" Emily asked.

Spencer looked at her thoughtfully.

"That would be great, but how?" he said confused.

"What if I teach you?" she said throwing up her hand to stop him. "It'll be between us only, no one ever knows or finds out. We could meet maybe twice a week, when we can and I'll teach you everything I know. This way, you'll feel properly equipped to deal with women and I'll get the added bonus of sex with a safe partner."

Spencer's jaw was dropped and he seemed unsure what to say. She could see the wheels turning in his head.

"This is not a trick. I am not setting you up to embarrass you. I genuinely want to help you and I think this is a beneficial relationship for us both. If you say no, I'm not going to be offended and I promise that either way this conversation is between us only," Emily explained.

Spencer chewed on his lip nervously. His converse sneaker bouncing as he let her words sink in. He looked at her and she could tell he was looking for sincerity in her eyes. That this was not a joke. Emily stared back at him seriously.

"Ok, I guess it's worth a try," he finally said meekly.

"If you don't like it, if you feel uncomfortable, if for whatever reason you have that you want to stop this arrangement then we do. No questions asked," she assured him.

He nodded his agreement.

"How about we start tonight? Come to my place around 8?" she said.

"Ok," he said nervously.

"Ok, well I'm going to go back. You should probably pour yourself another cup of coffee as that one is probably cold now," she said smiling.

Spencer watched her get up and walk out of the room as if nothing happened. As if he didn't just agree to have sex lessons with his co-worker. He stood up and scratched his neck worriedly. This was either going to be the greatest idea Emily ever had or the biggest mistake of Spencer's life.


	2. Chapter 2

_Let the lessons begin. Hope you enjoy and thanks for reading! xoxo_

(xxxxx)

Spencer sat nervously on Emily's couch. He could hear her fiddling in the bedroom. His heart was pounding a mile a minute. He started to doubt himself and rethink this entire situation. Before he could act on his urge to run, Emily walked out of the bedroom.

She was still wearing the black dress pants and red blouse she wore at work. She looked great in red, he thought.

"Ok, so for tonight we are going to begin with the basics. You need to know when it's ok to make a move," Emily said as she sat down next to him. "Do you know when a girl wants you to kiss her?"

Spencer thought about it, but decided to just shake his head no.

"Ok, face me," she said. Spencer obeyed. "When a girl wants you to kiss her she's going to linger after the date. She won't rush inside. She'll keep the conversation going, she may act shy or become flirty. One clear sign, she'll move closer and look at your lips, then glance back up at you. She may lick her own lips or bit her lip, either way, she'll be drawing attention to that area."

Spencer nodded as he watched Emily demonstrate.

"Kiss me," she said, catching him off guard.

"Huh?"

"Kiss me, I need to see what I'm working with," she said.

She could see how nervous he was and sighed.

"Ok, close your eyes and I'll initiate. Just follow my cues," Emily said scooting closer to him.

Spencer nodded and reluctantly closed his eyes. He felt Emily moving closer to him and heard her whisper relax. She placed her hands on his cheeks and gently placed her lips on his. She tilted her head slightly and parted her lips enough to take his top lip between hers.

She was about to pull away and tell him to open his mouth slightly, when she felt his hands pull her closer. She felt his mouth opening, so she followed suit. His tongue instantly slipping into her mouth. He gently brushed his tongue along hers.

Emily felt chills run up her spine as his hand came up to cradle her cheek and neck. He continued to tease and wrestle her tongue, causing her to forget this was just a lesson and not an actual make-out session. She felt him slow down his movements and gradually pull away from her lips.

Her eyes fluttered open and she saw him watching her curiously.

"Wow," she sighed.

"Wow, bad?" he said nervously.

"No, wow good. Spencer, you are a natural when it comes to kissing. That was incredible," Emily said smiling at him.

A blush rose to Spencer's cheeks as he ducked his head at the compliment.

"Thank you," he said. "You were good as well."

"Ok, well that helps bump up the steps a little bit. We can move right into the next lesson. Foreplay," she said.

"Foreplay?" he asked.

"Foreplay is a lot of fun. It's what helps get our sex engine revved up. During foreplay you want to find your lady's favorite things that turn her on. For some its kissing the neck or behind the ear. Some like when you kiss along their body. This is sort of like teasing to make you want sex so bad you are practically begging for it," Emily explained.

Spencer swallowed hard. He thought he was nervous about the kissing. This sounded terrifying.

"Try different things on your partner and listen to their reactions. If she likes it she'll moan or squirm under your touch," she said moving closer again. "Start off by kissing me and then explore my skin. Allow your hands to touch me where they want to. Slip under or remove any clothing if you feel the desire to. Odds are your partner will remove their own clothing to encourage your exploration."

Spencer nodded, but this time Emily didn't give him a lot of time to think about it. She grabbed his tie and pulled him to her mouth. As they kissed, she slowly reclined on the couch, bringing Spencer with her. He now lay slightly to her right on the couch.

They continued to kiss when Emily grabbed Spencer's hand and slipped it under her shirt slightly. He felt her warm, soft skin under his hand. He gently moved it around, enjoying the feel of her body. Emily broke their kiss to sit up and slip out of her top.

Spencer looked at her black bra that barely held her large breasts inside. She lay back down and smiled at him.

"Go ahead," she encouraged. "Explore."

Spencer bent down and placed his lips to her throat. He licked and nipped at the skin, making Emily sigh with pleasure. This gave him the courage to slide her bra strap to the side and place kisses along her shoulder.

"Remove it," Emily whispered.

Spencer brought his hands behind her back and shocked himself by easily unhooking it. Emily smiled at the look of surprise on his face.

"Good job," she said.

With that, she tugged it off and tossed it to the floor. Spencer once again looked at her breasts. They were so full and perfectly shaped. Her nipples were pink and hard. He felt himself wanting to see what they tasted like. Without thinking to ask, he slowly bent down and brought one into his mouth.

Emily let out a moan and he felt her fingers threading into his short hair. He couldn't help the smile that slipped across his lips knowing he was doing that to her. He used his tongue to flick her nipple as his other hand slid up her body and began massaging the leftout breast.

"Spencer, that feels good," Emily said closing her eyes.

Spencer continued to play with her breasts, when he felt Emily squirming under him. He sat up to see her biting her lip and it concerned him.

"Are you ok?" he asked.

"Oh, hell yes. You have no idea how great this feels. You are a quick learner and quite the natural. We need to move to the next step of foreplay," she said with labored breathing.

Emily unbuttoned her pants and slid the zipper down.

"Give me your hand," she said.

Spencer immediately obeyed and placed his hand in hers. She maneuvered her hand so that it lay on top of his. She pushed his hand down on her stomach and like a computer mouse she began directing it what to do. She kept going lower, until Spencer's fingers were just outside of her underwear.

She saw him watching her with a mixture of fear and arousal. She smiled.

"You can do this. Don't overthink it. Just enjoy it," she said as she let go of his hand.

Spencer took a deep breath and slid his hand underneath the band of her panties. He felt her legs spread apart slightly to give him better access. He kept eye contact with her as he moved slowly down to meet her clit. He felt her twitch, but she was smiling, so he knew it was ok.

He knew all about anatomy, but he'd never actually explored it like this before. When he had sex for the first time, it was just a quick in and out. There was no exploring of one another's bodies. Only kisses on the mouth and it really was not enjoyable at all.

This, however, was intoxicating. With every touch, he wanted more of her. As his fingers reached her wet entrance, he felt some pride. She was wet. That's what Morgan always talked about. About how wet she was for him. Now he understood why that was a good feeling.

He slid his finger up and down, changing the pressure with each stroke. Emily was wiggling beneath him and he noticed her eyes had closed. Remembering something else Morgan had said, he slid his finger in search of her entrance. With a bit of hesitation, he poked the tip of his pointer finger inside of her.

"Yes," Emily encouraged.

Spencer pushed his finger in further, surprised at how easily it slid inside. He felt her walls surrounding his finger and the warmth of her insides. It felt amazing. He slowly moved his finger in and out, making Emily arch in pleasure.

"More, Spencer," she begged.

He wasn't positive what she meant, but he took a chance and added a second finger to the mix. By this point, Emily was riding his fingers as she tried to get rougher. Spencer couldn't control his lust for her. He bent over and kissed her feverishly as he continued to press his fingers deep inside of her.

Emily was moaning in his mouth. Her hands clutching his hair tightly as she greedily ate up his kisses. Again, she lost herself in the moment and was panting as she felt herself growing closer to her release. She was able to stop herself and bring herself back to reality.

"Spencer, stop or I'm going to come. I'm not ready to finish yet," she said.

Spencer nodded and pulled his fingers out of her. Unsure of what to do, he stuck them in his mouth to suck it clean. Emily's jaw dropped and Spencer suddenly turned red.

"I …. I didn't …." He stuttered.

"No, Spence. That was hot," Emily said clearly turned on by this.

"Really?" he said surprised.

"Incredibly hot. See what happens when you just let yourself enjoy it?" she said smiling. "Ok, now lay down."

Spencer hesitated, but did as he was told. Once he was on his back, Emily straddled his lap. Her pants were now completely off and she wore nothing but her black lace underwear. Emily bent over and began unbuttoning Spencer's dress shirt. She saw the worry in his eyes, so she leaned over and began to kiss him.

While he was lost in the kiss, Emily finished unbuttoning his shirt. She pulled away and sat up straight.

"Take it off," she said.

Spencer sat up slightly and slipped out of the shirt. He handed it to Emily who tossed it on to the floor. He watched it hit the ground wishing she would have at least laid it nicely over the table or something. He quickly forgot about that when he felt Emily's hands running up and down his chest.

He felt her lips and tongue moving its way up her body. When she reached his neck, she moved to his ear where she got as close as possible and breathed erotically. Her warm breath and the sounds of her arousal were turning him on tremendously.

He felt her lick his earlobe before she sucked it into her mouth and bit lightly.

"Does it feel good," she whispered seductively in his ear.

"Mmm hmmm," he moaned in response.

Emily trailed back down his neck as her lower half began to rub against the bulge in his pants. She heard his moans of pleasure as she added a bit more pressure to her grinding. He let out a gasp at the feeling of this.

Emily sat up with a smirk on her face. She grabbed his belt and began to undo it. Once again, she could see the nervousness in his eyes. She unbuttoned his pants and began to slide the zipper down.

"It's ok. Trust me. Relax and enjoy," she said as she tugged his pants and briefs down.

He closed his eyes and tried to follow Emily's orders. The second he felt his dick release, he winced in fear. Waiting for her laughter.

"Spence, open your eyes."

He slowly opened one eye and looked at her. She was watching him with concern.

"Hey, it's ok. I swear there is no reason to be worried or ashamed. Your dick is perfect. It's the right size and has a great thickness to it. Nothing to be concerned about," she said with complete honesty.

Spencer watched her for signs of repulsion or humor, but he could see how serious she was. He gave her a quick head nod and took a deep breath. He let out a small squeak when Emily wrapped her hands around his shaft. She slowly slid her hand up and down, paying attention to the throbbing vein on the underside.

Emily closed her eyes as she began to rub his dick teasingly around her entrance. The tip of his penis pressing against her clit. She arched in enjoyment as Spencer watched and moaned at how good it felt.

"Are you ready?" she asked opening her eyes.

"I think so," he said.

"Relax and have fun," she said before lifting herself up to hover over his dick.

Spencer watched as Emily slowly pushed down on his aching member. It felt so good already and he was dying for more. Emily could feel Spencer lifting his hips as she pressed down. After a few attempts, he finally slid all the way inside and they both groaned happily.

Emily only waited a moment, before she began to lift herself up and slam herself back down. As she did this she also ground into his hips, making him moan loudly. Once she had her groove, Emily began riding Spencer hard as they both vocalized their pleasure.

He watched her breasts bouncing up and down and felt the desire to hold them. Lifting his hands, he squeezed and massaged them which elicited a groan from Emily. Her head tilted back and her mouth open as she gasped under his touch. Spencer suddenly desired more.

"Can I … can I be on top?"

Emily's eyes popped open at this request. She hadn't expected it, but she nodded and removed herself from him. They traded places and Spencer lined himself back up with her entrance. Emily wrapped her legs around him as he put both arms by her head. He stared into her eyes as he slowly began to move. Emily bit her lip and grunted.

"That feels good. Harder," she said as she closed her eyes again.

She felt Spencer's lips sucking on her neck as he thrusted rapidly into her. He felt his heart soar when he heard Emily screaming and arching beneath him.

"Fuck, yes. Damn it Spencer, that is so fucking good," she cried.

He brought her mouth to his and kissed her feverishly. She responded by tangling her fingers in his hair. Spencer pulled away and buried his face in her shoulder as he continued to pound into her. His arms wrapped around her body, pulling her closer to him. He felt himself nearing the end, but remembered what Emily said about the men coming before the women.

He also remembered how much she enjoyed having her clit stimulated. So, he slid his hand between them and began massaging it.

"Shit, yes! Oh Spencer! Fuck!" she cried as he quickly made circles on her. "I'm almost there. Oh fuck … fuck … Spence!"

With that he felt her walls squeeze his dick and felt a warmth spread around it. He watched Emily as she rode out the orgasm and it was the most beautiful thing he ever saw. With that, his final thrust had him emptying his seed into her. He groaned out in ecstasy before collapsing on top of her.

"Holy shit," Emily said as she tried to catch her breath.

Spencer wanted to agree, but he was too winded to talk. After he regained his breath, he slid out of her and rolled to the side.

"Spencer, that was amazing. You really are way too hard on yourself. I think teaching you is going to be incredibly easy and incredibly enjoyable," she grinned.

He blushed and smiled back at her.

"I had a good teacher," he said.

"Well, I had a brilliant student," she replied.

As they lay there trying to come down from their high, Spencer felt a swell of happiness run through him. He was actually good at sex and this arrangement seemed to be a great idea after all. He couldn't wait until their next lesson.


	3. Chapter 3

_Thanks for the nice reviews. I've never written something with the intention of this much sex – so I was a little nervous about it. Hope you enjoy this next one. xoxo_

(xxxxx)

Spencer wondered what it was going to be like at work now that he and Emily had seen each other naked. While it was amazing and she was completely normal the following morning when he left to get ready for work, he still worried reality would sink in.

As he stepped into the bullpen, he noticed that everyone was at their desks working quietly. He placed his bag down at his desk and started to sit down.

"Morning."

He looked up at Emily who gave him her normal greeting and smile. Spencer was at a loss for words so he just smiled and nodded back. Emily returned to her papers as if they didn't just spend the previous evening having sex. So, she didn't regret what happened and she clearly could separate their extra-curricular activities from work as she had assured him.

"Conference room."

The team looked up to see Hotch carrying his items to the room. They all quickly gathered their things and hurried off behind him.

(xxxxx)

Emily slowly walked through the dark forest. Her heart was beating incredibly loud in her chest as she tried to locate the unsub. It reminded her of a horror movie, where at some point out of nowhere the monster was going to appear in front of her. She held her gun steadily in front of her as she inched as quietly as possible along.

Her boots occasionally broke a stick or cracked a leaf, but that couldn't be helped. Her ears were straining to hear sounds around her. She reached a small clearing and stopped to listen. She was just about to move forward when she heard the sound of a gun. Slightly to her left, hidden by a tree, the unsub fell face first into the dirt.

Emily moved forward to kick the gun away, still in a daze from what just happened. She looked over her shoulder to see Spencer standing nearly 30 feet away watching her. She gave him a head nod and looked back at the unsub. He would've had a clean shot of her if Spencer wouldn't have been there.

She heard his voice over the com-link telling everyone that the unsub was down and the coordinates to him.

"You alright?"

Emily turned to see Spencer standing behind her.

"Yea, thanks for that," she said slightly out of breath.

"You're not in shock, are you?" he asked walking closer.

"Uh, it did scare the shit out of me, but no, I'm not in shock," she replied.

"Sorry there was no time to warn you. I was just about to walk over to you when I saw him coming from behind that tree with his gun pointed at you," Spencer said.

"No need to apologize. I'm glad you saw him, otherwise that could be me," she said pointing to the dead body.

The two of them stared at the body, unable to move. The gravity of the situation weighing on them both. Spencer looked up and saw a row of flashlights heading toward them.

"Hey, the rest of the team is nearly here. You want to head back?" he asked.

Emily thought a moment before nodding. The two of them walked off together.

(xxxxx)

Emily sat on Spencer's couch quietly sipping tea. After the near-death experience, Emily didn't want to be alone. After the rest of the team had left, she asked Spencer if he wanted company for the night. She was too afraid to tell him the truth, so she made it seem like another good night for a lesson.

She said after tough cases, it's always helpful to wind down with something pleasurable. Not that she didn't want to play with him, she enjoyed their last rendezvous. The fact that she nearly got shot scared her and the thought of going home to an empty house and reliving that moment over and over again was terrifying.

"So, what's tonight's lesson?" Spencer asked as he nervously tapped his cup.

Emily wondered if he would ever get over the insecurity and shyness.

"Well, I had some thoughts," she began.

"Yea," he said placing his mug down on the end table.

"I know since it's a lesson, you typically would go first so I can teach you, but I'd like to start tonight as a thank you," Emily said placing her cup next to his.

"Oh, um, ok. What, um, what are we doing?" he stuttered.

Emily didn't answer him. She just threw her leg over his lap and quickly straddled him. Without giving him time to think about, she placed her lips to his. Spencer slowly lifted his hands to cradle Emily's face as they kissed.

Their kiss began to heat up and Emily could feel Spencer's erection growing beneath her. When she felt he was ready, she slid off his lap, leaving him confused. He opened his mouth to ask her what she was doing, but Emily placed her finger to her lips and shushed him.

She lowered herself to the floor between his legs and began to unbuckle his belt. She could see him watching with a mixture of wonder and enjoyment.

"Lift," she said when everything was undone.

Spencer obeyed and lifted up enough for Emily to pull his pants and briefs down to his ankles. She looked up to see his face red with embarrassment. She never understood why he was so ashamed of his anatomy. It was completely average and based off their sex the other night, it worked more than well.

"It's ok, Spence. Relax," Emily said softly.

She slid her hands up his legs and took his dick in her hand. She slowly massaged it up and down as Spencer leaned back against the couch to enjoy. Once he seemed relaxed, Emily sat up and licked the vein all the way to the tip. Spencer let out a loud moan, which encouraged her to pull the entire thing into her mouth.

She not only heard him yelp, but he twitched at the feeling of having lips around his penis for the first time. Emily smiled as she began to move her mouth up, down, and around his throbbing cock. Her hand drifted to his balls and she gently massaged them. Glancing up, she saw Spencer's head tilted back with his mouth open in ecstasy.

She continued her sucking and licking for a few minutes when she felt his hands tangling in her hair. He began to press against her head to get her to move faster. She was surprised by this act of dominance. She never expected it from him, but she was glad he was opening himself up to her.

She moved as fast as she could when she felt his legs begin to shake. She knew he was close. Spencer removed his hands from her head.

"Em … I'm gonna finish," he said breathlessly.

"Go ahead," she said while continuing to suck him.

Spencer's eyes got big as he realized she wasn't going to move off of him. Maybe she didn't understand him, but it was too late. He couldn't stop it. His body betrayed him and released his warm, salty cum right into her mouth. Emily moved a bit longer before letting go of him. She wiped her mouth with the back of her hand and smiled at him.

"Em, I'm sorry. I … I told you …" Spencer said anxiously.

"Spencer, I know you did. I chose to do that. Don't worry about it. Oddly enough I think it tastes good," she said moving to sit next to him.

"Really?" he said surprised by this.

"Absolutely. You'll know exactly what I mean," she said grinning.

"Ok, well thank you," he said as he bent over to pull his pants back up.

"Well, thank you for saving my life," she replied. "You ready for your lesson?"

Emily didn't give him time to say you're welcome as she didn't want to think about or talk about the incident further. Spencer nodded as he finished buckling his belt.

"So, I imagine my lesson is oral on you," he said as he looked at her.

"Yes, there are lots of different names for it by the way. You'll hear Derek use all kinds of phrases, for example eating her out, going down on her, muff diving."

"Wow, why do people always use such unattractive words to describe something as beautiful as sex?" he said furrowing his brow.

"I don't know. That is a good question. I guess because society always tries to make it such a bad thing, when it's completely natural … or they were invented by stupid teenagers who think they are funny," she said shrugging. "Anyway, when you please your woman orally you have two options. One you can do like you did the other night and use just your fingers or you can also add your mouth."

"Oh, what do I do?" he asked looking a bit worried with the new assignment.

"As with anything in sex, it's all about testing things out to see what works. Just go with the flow," Emily said.

"Ok, could we maybe do this in the bedroom though? I'm kind of tall so sitting on the floor won't cut it and we won't both fit on the couch," he said.

"Sure."

Emily followed Spencer into his bedroom. She waited for him to get the bed ready and then climbed onto it. Spencer climbed on after her and pulled her pants and panties off immediately.

"Wasting no time, huh?" she giggled.

Spencer just shrugged before pulling her to the edge of the bed. He slid to the floor, where now he was at a better level to reach her. He licked his lips nervously.

"Ok … you … are you ready?" he asked.

Emily was propped up on her elbows.

"Yea, I'm ready. Don't be scared. Remember I'm not going to judge you. I'm here to help if you need it," she reassured him.

Spencer nodded. He lifted one of Emily's legs onto his shoulder and slowly kissed inch by inch up. His warm kiss and the flick of his tongue on her thigh was turning her on incredibly. Just when she thought he was going to reach her center, he breezed over it and began to kiss her other leg.

She wanted his mouth on her so bad. She tilted her head back as he neared her center again. Finally, ever so slightly she felt his mouth connect with her clit. She felt him gently kissing and licking it. She wanted him to be rougher, but she needed to give him time to explore before critiquing him.

She groaned in surprise when she felt his tongue move lower and push inside of her. Her hands gripped the sheets as she arched in pleasure. His tongue moved back up to focus on her clit, while he inserted his finger inside of her.

"Fuck, yes. That is so good, Spence," she moaned as she threaded her fingers into her own hair.

While he began gentle, the more Emily expressed her enjoyment, the more rapid and powerful his movements became. His two fingers curled inside her were moving in and out steadily, while he sucked and pressed his mouth against her sensitive spot.

"Holy shit, that feels amazing, holy shit," she cried as her legs shook near his head.

"That's it baby, come for me," she heard him whisper as he latched on to her, sucking roughly.

Emily felt her heart skip a beat. Did she really just hear him say that? Did Spencer Reid not only just devour her lady parts, but did he just call her baby? How has he never shared this gift with the world? He is the best lover she has ever had.

With that revelation, she screamed out as her body reached its orgasm. She felt Spencer lapping it up, while she collapsed on the bed. She couldn't even think straight. Between the mind-blowing oral she just received and the pet name she never expected, Emily was dazed.

She felt Spencer pulling her underwear back up and into place. She wanted to thank him, but she was too out of breath and riding high to talk.

"Em, why don't you scoot back and lay on the pillow?" Spencer said from his spot.

With jelly legs, Emily slid up to the pillow and flopped onto it. Spencer pulled the covers up and laid down next to her.

"Was I ok?" he asked.

"No, you were definitely not ok. You were amazing," she said.

"Thank you."

She could hear the pride in his reply and knew he was probably grinning as well. Emily turned on her side and soon fell asleep feeling completely safe and at ease.


	4. Chapter 4

_Sorry for the delay – I had a hard time writing this chapter. I hope you like it. The quote Spencer states is from NBC News – 10 Surprising Sex Statistics._

 _Enjoy! xoxo_

(xxxxx)

"Six shots, please!" Derek called out to the bartender.

The team had gone out to unwind after being away on a case for the week. Derek grabbed three shots in each hand and carried them to the table nearby. He placed them down and began handing them out to everyone.

"To a hell of team, earning a well-deserved night off," he said raising his glass.

They all followed suit and held their mini glasses in the air. As one they all tilted the cups back. Spencer didn't usually indulge in the drinking with everyone, he preferred wine, but ever since he started having sex with Emily he had this desire to experience more of their world.

His face scrunched up in displeasure at the taste of his drink. No wonder he stuck to wine. He heard giggling next to him and looked to see Emily grinning at him.

"What?" he said to her.

"Not used to liquor, are you?" she said.

Her eyes were sparkling at him. She looked so beautiful. She had on tight jeans with heels and some black contraption she called a shirt, that showed her stomach when she lifted her arms past a certain point. He couldn't help remembering how delicious her skin tasted.

"No, more of a wine connoisseur," he said as he pushed a stray piece of hair out of his eyes.

It fell right back to the same position. Emily giggled again and ran her fingers through his hair to push all of his locks away from his eyes. He felt himself tensing at this gesture, but nobody else seemed to notice and if they did they weren't making any fuss about it.

Emily's hands released his hair and she went back to drinking her liquor as if what she did was completely normal. Spencer forced himself to look away from her and try to find a new conversation to join in on.

"Wait, come on, that line actually worked?" J.J. scoffed.

"All you had to do was say that and she just spread her legs like you said the secret password?" Penelope said rolling her eyes.

"Girls, girls, girls. I am a smooth talker. I know how to sweet talk the ladies," Derek said leaning against the table. "And she didn't just spread her legs baby girl. There was a whole lotta experimenting going on."

"On that note, I'm going to go do anything else," Will said getting up from the table and walking off with J.J. following.

"So, tell us about this experimenting. What sort of stuff does Derek Morgan enjoy," Penelope flirted as she sipped her drink.

Derek started laughing as Penelope and Emily watched him with curiosity. Spencer listened, but looked down at the table. Even with his new found experience, he still felt incredibly awkward talking about it.

"There isn't a thing I don't enjoy," Derek grinned.

"Do they always orgasm during sex?" Penelope asked.

"Only 29% of women reach orgasm during sex. Most women cannot orgasm during sex at all, they can only do so through oral stimulation," Spencer raddled off.

He felt more comfortable talking in statistics. All eyes were on him now and he felt himself blushing.

"What would you know about orgasms? Besides what you read in a book," Derek said with irritation.

Emily's brow scrunched in anger. That was incredibly rude. She wanted to speak up and defend him, but when she looked at Spencer he just shrugged.

"Exactly, you just stick to your academics," Derek said.

"Since we are on the topic of orgasms," Emily began. She saw Spencer's head pop up. "I've been seeing this guy casually and wow," She said fanning herself.

"Ooh, Em you are dating someone? Who is it? You didn't tell me about this!" Penelope gushed as she bounced up and down.

"We aren't dating. Like I said it's casual and you don't know him so it wouldn't matter if I told you his name. I didn't tell anyone about it," she said sipping her drink.

"So, he's good in bed?" Penelope asked.

"Oh, is he ever," Emily said as she shot a glance at Spencer who was staring at her in shock. "He knows just how to get me going. He even figured out exactly how I like to be touched. His lips are soft and delicious. The way he looks at me is so hot."

Penelope groaned in enjoyment. She was hanging on every word. Derek looked skeptical and Spencer still stared in shock.

"He sounds amazing," Penelope sighed.

"He really is. He is something special," Emily said softly.

"And yet you're only doing casual? It sounds like you are interested in more," Penelope said.

"More than that things get complicated. For now, this is the best," Emily said.

"I don't know. This sounds a bit exaggerated to me," Derek said.

"How do you figure?" Emily asked shooting him a look.

"You are telling me that this guy is great in bed and from the sound of it you are intrigued by him. Yet, it's just casual," he said waving his hand around at the word casual.

"Your point?" Emily said staring at him.

"My point is, if he's that incredible why wouldn't you try to get your hooks in him before some other girl does?" he said.

Penelope looked at Emily waiting for her answer.

"I … I already told you. It's complicated," she said.

"No, I don't buy that. There are only two reasons you aren't moving forward with this guy. One, your story is full of shit. Two, you found some loser who's good in bed, but no other girl is interested in, making him a safe bet," Derek said folding his arms over his chest.

Emily's jaw dropped. Derek stared back at her with an eyebrow raised waiting for her answer. Their attentions turned to Spencer who had gotten up from his seat.

"I'm gonna head out. I forgot there's a documentary on quantum physics that I wanted to see. So, I'll … I'll see you guys later," he said as he put his jacket on.

"Awe, Reid," Penelope pouted.

"You're gonna miss the fun," Derek said as he took a swig of his drink. "I'm not done grilling Prentiss on her imaginary boyfriend."

"Sorry," Spencer said before hurrying off.

Emily's heart sunk. She saw how humiliated he was and she knew the wheels in his insecure little brain were on overdrive. She wanted to chase after him, but knew it would be suspicious. She thought for a moment and came up with an idea.

"I'm going to go get another drink. Anyone want something?" Emily asked.

They declined as Emily hurried off. She got to the bar and ordered a drink. As she walked back to the table, she made sure to purposely bump into someone, spilling her drink all over herself. The man apologized profusely as she apologized to him.

Emily came walking back to the table with a pretend look of irritation. Penelope was the first to notice Emily's soaked pants.

"What happened?" Penelope said surprised.

"Some guy bumped into me and spilled my drink everywhere," she said pretending to be upset. "I need to go home. I'll talk to you guys later."

They said their goodbyes before Emily rushed from the bar.

(xxxxx)

Spencer was surprised when he heard a knock at his door. He wandered over, still dressed from the bar, minus his tie. He looked in to the peephole and sighed. He opened the door with a frown.

"Emily what are you doing here?" he said and then scrunched up his nose. "And why do you smell like you brought the bar with you?"

"My drink was spilled on me," she said. "Can I come in?"

She could see his hesitation, but he stepped aside allowing her into the apartment.

"Do you want a change of clothes?" Spencer offered as he noticed just how wet her jeans actually were.

"I'm ok. I mean, not really, but … Spence, what Morgan said was not true," she said.

"Of course, it is. Emily, I'm nearly thirty years old and I'm getting sex lessons from a co-worker who is way too hot for a guy like me," he said dejectedly. "No one is lining up to steal me away. Exactly as Morgan explained it."

"Spencer, do you even remember _anything_ I said tonight regarding our sex?" Emily asked with her hand on her hip.

"I have an eidetic memory," he said. She was just waiting for him to add on a 'duh' at the end of that statement.

"So, you remember how I described you. I don't know why that isn't sticking in your mind. Why only the stupid shit that Derek said because he was butt hurt that we didn't fawn over his masculinity booster story," she said.

"I just want to be more than what everyone sees. I'm sick of being the brunt of everyone's jokes. I'm sick of being the safety net for everyone to fall on, but nobody thinks to offer the same in return for me. You all use me for my brain and tolerate the rest," Spencer said.

"You want honesty?" Emily said getting fired up.

"Yes. I want honesty, Emily. Don't sugar coat it. Tell it like it is," he said as he braced himself for her response.

"Ok. Here it goes. First, you are right. We do take you for granted and treat you disrespectfully at times. It's not because we don't care about you, it's because we _do_ care about you. Morgan treats you the way he does because he sees you as his little brother. If you notice he only gets riled up when you make him look bad. It's like a sibling jealousy, rivalry thing.

Second, we often can't be your safety net because you don't tell us what is wrong with you. Let's face it, we are a team that likes to keep our secrets. So, don't assume we don't care. We just may not know.

As for me, I don't do relationships. I don't trust people. I've had my heart broken before and I won't allow myself the chance to hurt again. I get my needs taken care of and I move on," Emily explained as he listened intently.

"I enjoy having sex with you. You are incredibly talented and it's comforting to know the person I'm vulnerable with is you. Because I know you won't hurt me. If things were different Spencer … you are a great catch and women are stupid for not banging down your door."

A small smile hit his lips. He kept his head down, but he looked up through his hair at her.

"Thank you," he said softly. "I'm sorry. I just get so … insecure sometimes."

Emily walked closer and reached for his hand. She gave it a loving squeeze.

"I know. I understand and that's why I'm trying to help you. I want you to feel confident and know that you have more to offer women than just your intelligence," she said.

Spencer nodded. They held hands silently for a few awkward minutes. Finally, Spencer spoke up.

"So, do you want a change of clothes?" he offered again.

"Actually, since I'm here. I figured, we might as well … ya know … learn some more," she said with a grin.

"Ok," he said a bit nervously.

"Tonight, I'll teach you how to please your girl from behind," Emily said.

(xxxxx)

Emily managed to peel herself out of the alcohol stained clothes and now stood in Spencer's bedroom completely naked. Spencer was nearly out of his attire as he approached her.

"Ok, come up behind me," Emily commanded him.

Spencer stepped forward until his body pressed against hers. She could feel him already hardening. She felt his hand moving her hair out of the way. She felt his warm lips pressing against her shoulder.

"Good, remember to always explore. Don't be afraid," she said barely above a whisper.

Spencer didn't say anything, but he slid both hands around her. As he kissed along her shoulder, his one hand fondled her breast, while the other found its way to her entrance. Emily sucked in her breath as Spencer teased her. His finger flicked her clit a few times before he pressed a bit harder. Emily let out a moan.

After a few moments, of playing with her entrance she leaned on the nightstand. Her back was nearly parallel to the floor, while her ass faced Spencer at a nearly perfect angle.

"Ok, now fuck me from behind," she said.

"Ok," she heard him utter under his breath.

Spencer began to press his dick into her body slowly. When he finally broke through to be completely swallowed by her, Emily let out a groan. Spencer put his hands on her hips and began slowly moving in and out. He started moaning at this new pleasure.

"Oh, Emily, fuck," he said as he thrusted into her.

"Feels good, doesn't it?" she said as she looked over her shoulder.

As Spencer moved, his head tilted back and his mouth dropped open. Emily felt an odd twinge of desire burn through her. She suddenly wanted his mouth on hers so badly it nearly ached. She knew at this angle they wouldn't be able to kiss, but she needed something.

She reached back and grabbed his hand pulling it around to her face. She pressed three of his fingers down before shoving the index into her mouth. She licked and sucked on it as he continued to pound into her.

"That is oddly hot," she heard him say.

Emily just moaned her enjoyment as she continued to suck on his finger like it was his dick. She let out a shout of pleasure when she felt Spencer's hand rubbing furiously at her clit. When she let go of his finger, he brought that hand back to help hold her in place as he moved in and out of her.

"Oh, oh, shit … uhhhhh … Spencer … fuuuuuuuccckkkkk," Emily groaned as she was slammed harder and harder into.

The table shook and things were falling off it, but Spencer didn't seem to care. The lamp fell sideways as the two of them clutched one another. Spencer's arm was wrapped around her waist now as he moved with force.

Finally, Emily screamed as she went over the edge, Spencer followed only seconds after. Emily's head dropped onto her arms that were on the nightstand. Spencer lay over her back as the two of them panted.

Too soon for Emily, they separated. Spencer flopped down on the bed, trying to catch his breath. Emily dropped next to him. A few minutes later, she turned to face him.

"You don't really need lessons Spence. You are fucking amazing," she said smiling at him.

He blushed and waved her off.

"I'm serious," she said before looking away. "And I was serious about what I said about if things were different."

Spencer looked over at her and she slowly turned to look him in the eye. She saw the shock. Emily ran her hand along his cheek. She propped herself on her elbow and continued to hold eye contact with him. Without a word, she leaned down and pressed her lips to his.

Spencer responded immediately by tangling his hands into her hair and pulling her closer to him. They kissed passionately before they were forced to stop for air. Emily smiled at him before snuggling into his arms.

She had to fight the feelings that were starting to grow for him. They couldn't be in a relationship. It would never work and she didn't want to hurt him. He was too wonderful and she was too damaged. Soon she found herself drifting off to sleep in his arms.


	5. Chapter 5

_Alright, I made up for the delay with another chapter today. It seems this story is finally taking flight. This will follow a bit of what was on Criminal Minds, but with my own spin. Some episodes may be out of order as well – this is done intentionally._

 _Enjoy! xoxo_

(xxxxx)

As usual, Spencer arrived promptly at the time Emily asked him to. He usually came in his work attire, but this evening he actually looked casual. He was wearing khakis and a black t-shirt. It was nothing fancy, but she'd never seen him out of a suit or sweater vest before.

He gave his little awkward wave and smiled when she swung the door open. She loved that even though he was gaining confidence sexually, he was still the sweet Spencer she always knew. She closed the door behind him and turned around to see him watching her nervously.

"You ok?" she asked furrowing her brow.

"Yea, I … uh … I … Morgan he, um, he was talking about something the other day and I don't really know," he said turning a deep shade of red.

"Spence, don't be embarrassed to ask me to do something. This might sound bad, but there isn't much I won't do," Emily said.

"It just … I don't know … I think as great as this is, it still sort of feels … wrong," he said frowning.

"Oh?" Emily said surprised.

"Not you! It's not you at all! I don't mean it like that. I just, I'm an old-fashioned kind of guy and well I always pictured sex as something I special I'd share with the person I love. Oh, man this is not coming out right at all," he said getting frustrated.

Emily walked closer and grabbed Spencer's hand.

"It's ok, I understand," she said gently.

"Emily, I care about you deeply. Honestly, sometimes more than I probably should," he said which surprised her. "I mean you can't be surprised by that. You are gorgeous and smart and funny and fierce. I know someone hurt you, but I hope someday you can find the strength to open your heart to let someone love you."

Emily was taken back by his words. They both stood there in an awkward silence.

"Maybe I should just go," Spencer said staring down at her.

Emily wasn't sure when exactly it happened, but when she looked up they were incredibly close. She could feel his breath on her face. Her heart was racing. She didn't understand what was happening to her.

"I … " she swallowed hard. "You don't have to, if you don't want to." Her words were barely above a whisper.

Spencer took a step closer.

"I don't want to," he whispered back.

He slowly and hesitantly moved closer. His mouth inched its way to her. Just when Emily closed her eyes and felt his lips hovering over hers, her phone rang. The two jumped back in surprise as Emily fumbled to pull the phone from her pocket.

She looked at the caller and then at Spencer who was running his fingers through his hair. She could tell he was trying to digest what just happened between them.

"I'm sorry, I need to take this," Emily said before she walked off.

Spencer nodded, but couldn't find the words to speak. Had he just tried to make a move on Emily? Sure, they'd been having sex, but that was a friendship thing. This – well, this was different. This was more intimate and full of desire.

He had to have been wrong, there was no way Emily could be interested in him. She was just trying to calm him down and start another lesson. She made it clear she didn't want to be with him or anyone else for that matter.

This was bad. He needed to leave. Just as he made up his mind, Emily walked back into the room. The thought of leaving vanished when he saw the look on her face. She was closing her phone and staring at the floor.

"Emily, are you alright?" he asked.

She looked up as if she forgot he was there. She put a fake smile on her face.

"Yea, everything's fine. Just an old friend," she said waving it off.

Spencer went to ask her more, but she interrupted him.

"So, you never did ask me about what Morgan said that you wanted to know about," she said leaning against the back of her couch.

"Do you think that's a good idea? I mean, after …" he trailed off.

"After what?" she said completely distracted.

Spencer's heart sank. He was right. It didn't mean anything.

"Um, no actually, I think I'm going to just go home tonight. I'll see you tomorrow," he said as he walked off and out the door.

Emily watched him leave. She wanted to chase after him and tell him that moment was real, but this was the right thing to do. Especially after the phone call she received.

(xxxxx)

Spencer sat at the coffee shop staring at his drink. He was never great on reading women, but he really thought Emily liked him. He knew he needed to stop dwelling on it and just move on, but it hurt like hell.

"Excuse me?"

Spencer looked up to see a cute brunette smiling at him. She wore jeans and flowered tank top. She was snuggled into a black sweater and held a coffee cup in her hand.

"I'm sorry to bother you. Is this yours?" she asked holding up a cell phone.

"Oh, yea. Thank you. I must've put it down without realizing it," he said taking the phone from her.

"I'm Brooke," she said holding out her hand.

Spencer normally avoided contact with strangers, but he reached out and grasped hers.

"Spencer," he said.

He felt a jolt of pride. It was the first time he hadn't stuttered out his name … his full name and title!

"Would you like to sit with me?" he asked, suddenly freaking out that he went too far with this new confidence.

"I actually need to get home. I work early tomorrow," she said. "But, if you are up for a walk, I'd love the company."

Spencer quickly stood up, nearly knocking over his chair. His bag fell to the ground and he almost spilled his coffee. He felt his face turning bright red as he bent down to pick up the items that fell from his bag. He stood up to see Brooke smiling at him.

"I'm sorry. I'm a bit of a klutz," he said embarrassed.

Brooke let out a small giggle. "It's ok. I can be that way too. My mom used to call me crash," she said.

"My mom did too!" Spencer said. His voice raising in pitch.

"Are you kidding?" Brooke said laughing.

"No, I'm serious. I mean, she didn't realize my injuries were not self-inflicted, but none-the-less she called me that," Spencer said as he held the door open for her.

"Well, it truly is a small world," Brooke responded as they stepped outside. "So, Spencer when you aren't picking up women in coffee shops what do you do?"

Spencer nearly choked on his drink. Brooke looked at him with a bright smile.

"Oh, no. I … I don't … I am not," he stuttered.

"It's ok, I was just teasing. It made for a nice segue into my question," she said.

"Oh," he chuckled awkwardly. "Um, well I work for the FBI. The Behavioral Analysis Unit to be exact."

Brooke looked at him with a furrowed brow.

"I know, I look young. I get that all the time," he said as he dug into his bag and produced his credentials.

Brooke looked at his FBI ID. Her expression changed to that of impressed. Spencer put the credentials back into his bag.

"Wow, and doctor. That's mighty ambitious of you. I take it you were young when you graduated high school?" she said.

"Yes, I graduated when I was 12," he said blushing.

"And your doctorate is in?" she asked.

"Chemistry, Engineering, and Mathematics. I, also, have BA's in Psychology, Sociology, and Philosophy," he said looking down at his feet.

"Spencer Reid, it's safe to say that you are the most intriguing man I've ever met," Brooke said smiling at him.

"Really?" Spencer said shocked.

"Absolutely, I'm sure you can keep a conversation going for hours with all the knowledge you keep stored in that brain of yours," she said lightly poking the side of his head.

Spencer laughed and she giggled.

"Not many people see it that way," Spencer said.

"Their loss," she said nonchalantly.

Spencer felt himself blush at her comment.

"So, you said you have to get up early for work. What is it that you do?"

"I'm a teacher at the school for the deaf and blind," Brooke responded.

"Wow, that's amazing. What made you take that path?" Spencer wondered.

"My brother is deaf and my mom said ever since I was a kid I was always trying to teach him new things. I guess teaching was in my blood," she said smiling.

They reached a well-lit apartment complex. Brooke stopped walking and looked shyly at Spencer.

"This is my place. Thank you for walking me home," she said.

"It was my pleasure. Thank you for finding my phone. My boss wouldn't be too pleased if I lost it," he replied.

They both laughed lightly, before an awkward silence fell amongst them.

"I don't normally do this, but you wouldn't want to go out sometime? Maybe for coffee or dinner?" Brooke asked.

Spencer could see she was nervous about the question. It was comforting to meet someone as shy as he was.

"I would love that actually," Spencer said smiling at her.

Brooke pulled out her phone and pressed a few buttons.

"What's your number?" Spencer relayed the digits to her. "Well, Spencer, have a good night and I'll talk to you soon."

"Yes, definitely. Sweet dreams," Spencer said gently.

Brooke went into the apartment complex before Spencer walked away with a grin on his face. He couldn't believe what luck. Here he was depressed that Emily wasn't interested in him and he found a beautiful girl who did. Funny how life works.

As he strolled down the street in a happy daze his phone made noise. He looked down to see an unfamiliar number. He opened the text and smiled.

 _Thank you again for the walk. I look forward to getting to know you better. -Brooke-_

He quickly sent a reply back and felt his heart racing. He'd have to ask Morgan when he was allowed to call her again, but he certainly hoped it would be soon.


	6. Chapter 6

_Shorter chapter – sorry. I will try to update again this weekend. Thanks for the amazing comments! I look forward to those!_

 _Enjoy! xoxo_

(xxxxx)

It had been two weeks since Spencer and Emily had sex. They never talked about that night, though Emily thought about it often. She constantly questioned herself and her decision to push him away. Every time she received a phone call or got a text message she remembered why they couldn't be together.

It was Friday night and the team had the weekend off, pending any serious cases. Everyone was gathering up their belongings, when Penelope came bouncing into the bullpen.

"Alright, what are we doing tonight? Drinks? Movies?" she said.

"I'm out. I promised Henry we would have a family camp out," J.J. said.

"I'm game for whatever," Emily said as she stood up.

"Yea, I'm in," Derek said, before glancing at Spencer. "Pretty boy, you in?"

Spencer was throwing his bag over his head.

"Oh, no. Sorry, I can't," he said adjusting the bag to fit more comfortably.

"Come on, what do you have to do that's better than what we are going to do? Don't be a hermit, come out with us," Derek prodded.

"Sorry," Spencer shrugged before hurrying off.

"Alright, well guess it's just the three of us. So, what are we doing?" Derek asked.

"Let's go eat first. Then we can decide," Penelope said.

They all agreed, finished gathering their things, and headed to the elevator.

(xxxxx)

"Where do you want to eat?" Penelope whined.

"Will someone pick already!" Derek snapped. "We've been driving around for 20 minutes."

"The next restaurant we pass on the left side is where we are eating," Emily said with finality.

Derek pulled into a parking lot of the next restaurant on his left. He parked the car and they all climbed out.

"This will do. At least it has variety and won't take long," Derek said as he walked toward the diner entrance.

They were quickly seated and looking at their menu's when Penelope gasped.

"No frickin' way," she said as her jaw dropped.

"What?" Derek asked looking at her.

"Look who just walked in," Penelope said with an emerging smile.

Derek looked to where Penelope was staring, while Emily had to turn around in the opposite direction to look. Emily's heart stopped. Walking towards the other end of the restaurant was Spencer and he was holding some cute brunette's hand.

"Well, look at that. Pretty boy couldn't hang with us because he's on a date," Derek grinned.

"It would be totally rude if we didn't go say hi, right?" Penelope said devilishly.

"Absolutely," Derek laughed.

Emily didn't want to go with them, but figured it would look suspicious, so she followed behind them. Spencer's back was to them, so they got a good look at his date. Derek was impressed at how attractive she was.

"This seems like a good spot to sit," Derek said as he sat at the table next to Spencer's.

Spencer's head snapped in their direction and his face instantly turned red. His eyes got larger and his mouth popped open. His date looked at him and back at Derek.

"What are you doing here," Spencer said through clenched teeth.

"Getting something to eat, obviously," Derek said smiling.

By now, Penelope and Emily both found seats at Derek's new table.

"You gonna introduce us or not?" Derek asked.

"Or not," Spencer replied.

"Awe, don't be like that Pretty boy. Hi, Derek Morgan, I work with Reid," he said holding out his hand.

"Hi, Brooke," she said returning the handshake.

"I'm Penelope Garcia, I also work with Reid. Can I just say how adorable you are?" she said getting up to give Brooke a hug.

Brooke accepted the awkward hug, but had a smile on her face when Penelope pulled away. Emily watched quietly until she saw everyone looking at her.

"Oh, um, Emily. Prentiss. Hi," she said waving from her seat.

"It's nice to meet you. Spencer's told me a lot about all of you," Brooke said shyly.

"Good things I hope," Derek said charmingly.

Brooke giggled. "Yes, all good. Would you like to join us? There's plenty of room for more," she said giving Spencer a look of approval.

Spencer sighed. "Plenty of room."

Everyone could tell he wasn't thrilled with the idea. Emily was about to speak up and suggest they leave the two alone, but Derek and Penelope had other ideas. They both got up and pushed their way into the booth. Emily sighed and dragged a chair to sit at the head of the table.

"So, how long has this been going on?" Penelope asked, pointing between Spencer and Brooke.

"Not long. About two weeks," Brooke said as she tucked a piece of hair behind her ear.

Emily realized it had been two weeks since that night. The night she pushed him away. She pushed him straight into the arms of this adorable girl. _Way to go Emily._

The rest of the evening they spent getting to know Brooke. Spencer started to ease up halfway through the dinner and even joined in on the conversations and stories. Every once in a while, Brooke and Spencer would look at each other and smile or blush. It was obvious there was a connection there. Emily hated her. She hated her because she wanted to be her.

"Brooke, it has been an honor meeting you. I hope we get to see you again soon," Derek said shaking her hand.

"Thank you. It was a pleasure meeting you all as well," Brooke said smiling.

They said their goodbyes and separated. Emily was in a hurry to get back to the car. She just wanted to go home, but again Derek and Penelope had other ideas. The two of them hid behind the bushes to spy on Spencer and Brooke.

They stood facing each other, both looking incredibly shy. Brooke was shuffling her feet, while playing with the necklace around her neck. Spencer had his hands in his sweater pockets and kept looking at the ground.

"Come on, kiss her," Derek whispered as if willing Spencer to hear him.

The two continued to talk a bit longer, before Brooke pointed over her shoulder with her thumb. Derek figured she was telling him that she had to leave. Spencer nodded his head. Brooke let go of her necklace and wrapped her arms around Spencer's neck giving him a hug. He reciprocated immediately with his hands wrapping around her.

As she started to pull away from the hug, she stopped and looked longingly at Spencer.

"Oh, oh! She's giving him the signal! Go for it!" Penelope said excitedly slapping Derek on the shoulder.

With that Spencer leaned his head down and pressed his lips to hers. Derek and Penelope high fived each other as the quietly laughed and celebrated. By now Spencer's hands had moved up to cup both side of Brooke's face.

Derek and Penelope were enjoying the show when they heard retching behind them. They turned to see Emily hanging over the bushes tossing her dinner.

"Oh, Emily," Penelope said rushing to her friend's side.

She proceeded to rub Emily's back as Emily coughed and spit into the bushes.

"Damn Prentiss, dinner not agree with you?" Derek asked, with a scrunched up face.

"Apparently, can we go please," Emily said as she stood up and wiped her mouth.

"Sure, sweetie. Come on, let's get you home," Penelope said as she kept her arm around Emily.

In the car, Emily propped herself against the cool glass window. Her stomach still churning from the sight of Spencer kissing another woman. How did it come to this? How did recreational sex with a friend, turn into a broken heart?

It was the best for Spencer. He was safe and now he had someone to love. But if it was the right thing to do, why did it hurt so badly? A tear slipped from Emily's eye and she quickly wiped it away. It was right because it was selfless. She couldn't endanger his life, all to satisfy her need to be with him. She swallowed the lump in her throat and closed her eyes. Eventually this pain would go away. It had to.


	7. Chapter 7

_Thank you for the comments – I'm glad you are all enjoying this. I will warn you that there will be some violence and torture in the next few chapters, but as always there will be a happy ending. I could never let my sweet boy not have a happy ending … like they do to him on the show :(_

 _Enjoy! xoxo_

(xxxxx)

Emily woke startled by the sound of a knock on her door. She looked at the clock, 5:54am. That was 6 minutes before her alarm typically went off. She rolled out of bed yawning as she schlepped to the door. She looked through the peephole, but nobody stood there. She slowly opened the door and a box fell at her feet.

She looked around the hallway nervously before picking the box up. She brought it inside and placed it on the counter. She slowly opened it and peered inside. Her heart dropped. She reached inside and pulled out a photo album.

Slowly flipping through the pages were pictures of Spencer. Easily months worth of pictures. Ian Doyle was back and he was following Spencer. He knew. After all this time trying to protect Spencer, Ian knew. Of course, he did. Despite the fact that he was a psychopath, Emily had experienced his miniscule loving side.

The years they spent together, although fake, had still bound them. Ian could read her, just as easily as she could read him. She should have known that she could never hide her feelings for Spencer from Ian. And now because of her, he was in danger.

(xxxxx)

Spencer said goodbye to Brooke and left the coffee shop to head for work. He reached his car and started to unlock it, when he felt his body seize up. A pillow case was thrown over his head and he felt himself being tied up. He couldn't move and could barely breath. He heard faint voices, but they weren't speaking English.

He strained to hear what they were saying, but it was too faint and he was dazed. All he knew was he'd been taken into a van and his entire body ached. He had a hard time focusing on the turns they were making, due to the lack of oxygen he was receiving. He was already sweating and feeling light-headed.

He wasn't sure how long he'd been in the van, but eventually it came to a stop. Rough hands yanked him out of the car. He tried to keep up with them, but kept tripping. When this happened the two men dragging him would shout at him. He walked for a few minutes before he was pushed forcefully down onto a chair.

He felt more restraints being tied around him. When they finished, the pillow case was yanked off his head. Spencer happily gulped and gasped to fill his lungs with air. He coughed a few times as he adjusted to breathing again.

He was about to ask them what was going on, when duct tape was suddenly pressed over his mouth. Spencer tried to move and protest, but it was useless. These men knew what they were doing. Escaping their clutches without his team would be a miracle.

(xxxxx)

Emily sat in the nearly empty park. It was cold and the only passerby's were a few bikers or joggers. She checked her watch and looked up when she heard footsteps behind her. She tensed up when the person stopped moving.

"Hello Lauren," Ian said. "Oh, I'm sorry it's Emily now, isn't it?"

Ian walked around the bench to sit next to Emily. He looked over the open field as if enjoying the view.

"What do you want?" Emily said angling herself towards him.

"You know exactly why I am here. Do not pretend otherwise," Ian said coolly.

Emily pursed her lips.

"So, if you plan on killing me, what are you waiting for?"

Ian laughed.

"Have we been separated for so long that you don't even remember how I work?" He looked at her finally. His blue eyes burning into hers.

"Did you think I would just willingly go with you?" Emily said as she slid her gun out of her pocket just enough for him to see.

Ian still smiled at her. This made her uneasy.

"Darling, I know all of your tricks. You won't use that gun on me anymore than I will use a gun on you," he said.

"What makes you so sure of that?" Emily said her lip curling.

Ian reached into his pocket and pulled out his cell phone. He pushed a few buttons and held the phone up for Emily to see. She gasped when she saw video of Spencer tied to a chair. His head hung loosely, his hair soaked and dangling over his face.

"Don't hurt him, please. It's me you want to kill. I'm the one who took Declan from you. Don't punish him for my choices," Emily pleaded.

"So, you don't want Dr. Reid to be hurt for your choices, yet my son lost his life because of your choices? Does that sound fair to you?" Ian said glaring at her.

"Please, Ian, I'll do whatever you want. Just let him go," Emily said as she tried to hold back tears. "We had something special. I'll be that girl again. I can be whatever you want me to be."

Ian looked at her carefully. He moved closer to her as if he was going to kiss her. Emily shut her eyes and braced herself, when she heard a crack and darkness engulfed her.

(xxxxx)

Spencer heard the door opening and tried to look to see who was coming. The same two men that had dragged him in, were now carrying Emily. As they had done with him, they tied her to a chair directly across from him. He could see blood dripping down the side of her face.

"Dr. Reid, I thought you seemed lonely, so I brought a friend for you," Ian said as he walked up from behind Spencer.

Spencer was glaring at Ian as he watched the, surprisingly handsome, man walk behind Emily. Her head was still hanging limply, but she was stirring slightly. Ian grabbed a handful of Emily's hair and yanked her head backward. Emily groaned as she began to come to.

"Wake up, Emily," Ian said sweetly into her ear.

Emily's eyes fluttered open. She was disoriented and confused. Ian had a big satisfied smile on his face as he stared down at her.

"There she is. Thanks for joining us," Ian said.

Emily lifted her head from its reclined position and caught sight of Spencer. He was looking at her with worried eyes. His mouth taped shut and his body roped just like hers.

"Spencer," she said barely above a whisper.

Ian grabbed a nearby chair and sat between the two prisoners. He glanced between the two with a grin.

"Ian, please let him go. This is between us," Emily said as she became more aware.

Ian let out a laugh. "If only it were just between us. You will pay for what you've done."

With that Ian stood up and walked to a table nearby. He lifted up a hammer and waltzed over to Spencer, who was watching him with fear in his eyes.

"Ian please! I'll do anything! Please," Emily shouted.

"Which knee was it again that got shot? I think I remember that it was your left," Ian said as he towered over a whimpering Spencer.

Ian lifted his arm and swung the hammer as hard as he could into Spencer's left knee. Spencer howled behind the tape as Emily sobbed and screamed for Ian to stop. Ian stood back to admire his work.

"You coward!" Emily yelled.

"Say whatever you want to me. Your words mean nothing. I'll be back shortly," Ian said before walking away.

Spencer was breathing rapidly as he squirmed in the chair in pain. Tears streamed from his eyes that were clenched shut. Emily tried desperately to get out of the restraints, but she couldn't. Eventually she gave up, crying hysterically. This was all her fault and Spencer had to pay for it. She never should have fallen for him.

"I'm so sorry," Emily sobbed over and over until she had nothing left in her.

Spencer had lost consciousness due to the amount of pain, which in some ways Emily was glad he wasn't hurting, at the moment. She knew it would be short lived and Ian would return to inflict more pain. She just hoped the team would find them before it was too late.


	8. Chapter 8

_You guvs have been giving me lots of great ideas and inspirations. Thank you so much for the comments and the suggestions. Sometimes those start to spur other ideas for stories too – so feel free to keep it coming_ _*Oh, and violence again *_

 _Enjoy! xoxo_

(xxxxx)

Derek sat at his desk reading a file when his desk phone rang.

"Morgan," he said into the receiver.

"Agent Morgan, I'm terribly sorry to bother you, but we have a young woman in the lobby demanding to see you. She said it's an emergency regarding Dr. Spencer Reid," the security guard said.

"Send her up," Derek said.

He hung up the phone and got up from his desk. He walked out of his office and straight towards the elevators, where he'd wait for the arrival of the young woman. He only waited a few seconds before the doors opened and she walked off the elevator.

"Brooke, what's wrong?" he said concerned.

"Spencer's been kidnapped. I saw it, they just took him," she said as tears streamed from her eyes.

"Ok, baby girl, ok. Calm down, come with me," he said as he put his arm around her shoulder and lead her to the conference room.

On his way to the conference room, he signaled Luke, Tara, and J.J. to follow him. He also gave a brief knock on Rossi's door as he passed by. As Brooke settled into one of the chairs, the rest of the team came walking in.

"What's going on?" Luke asked as he looked at the crying brunette.

"Reid's been kidnapped," Derek said as he stood next to Brooke.

"What?" J.J. gasped.

"Who's this?" Rossi said.

"This is Reid's girlfriend, Brooke," Derek introduced.

The woman looked up with an embarrassed smile. "Lovely way to meet you all," she sniffled.

"It's ok, just tell us what happened," Tara said kindly.

Brooke wiped her nose with the tissue that J.J. handed her.

"We just finished having coffee and we needed to get to work. He went to his car while I headed towards mine. I realized that I forgot to give him his jacket back. It was cold in the coffee shop and he let me borrow it. When I turned the corner … I saw … these guys they … they …" she started getting choked up again.

"You are doing great," Derek assured her as he rubbed her shoulder.

Brooke took a deep breath and looked up at the ceiling for a moment. When she felt she had calmed enough she continued.

"These guys they pressed something into his back and he started shaking. He would've fallen to the ground, but they caught him and dragged him into their van. I ran after them, but it was too late. They were already out onto the road."

"J.J., call Emily," Rossi said.

"Brooke, can we ask you some more questions?" Derek asked as he sat down in a chair next to her.

"Yea, I don't know how much more help I'll be," she said wiping away some tears with the back of her hand.

"It seems useless, but sometimes the smallest details can help us predict and read the unsub," Tara said as she too sat down.

"Unsub?" Brooke said furrowing her brow.

"Unknown subject, the kidnappers," Tara explained.

Brooke nodded her understanding.

"Ok, we are going to have you close your eyes. I want you to tell us everything you see, hear, smell, anything," Derek said.

Brooke nodded again. She seemed afraid to close her eyes. Derek held out his hand and Brooke grabbed it. He could feel her shaking.

"I'm right here Brooke. You are safe with us," Derek assured her.

"Ok," she whispered.

"Close your eyes and tell me what happened after Spencer walked away."

"I was walking back to my apartment. I live just two blocks from the coffee shop, so I don't drive when we meet there. I had just gotten to the corner to cross, when I looked down and noticed I was still wearing Spencer's jacket.

I turned around and started jogging back to the coffee shop. The parking lot is around back, so I tried to move quickly. I didn't want him to leave without it. I turned the corner and I saw two guys jump out of a van and put some black thing to Spencer's back."

"What color was the van?" Tara interrupted.

"It's white. It looks like the kind of trucks that repairmen drive, only it wasn't as dirty or rusty. It was in better condition," Brooke said.

"Can you read the license plate?"

Brooke's face scrunched up in concentration. She shook her head no.

"No, no, I can't. It's too far away," she frowned. "I'm sorry."

"No, don't be sorry. This is helping," Tara said. "You said you tried to run after them?"

"Yea, I don't know what I thought it would do, but I just started running. I saw a man driving the car," she said.

"Describe him," Derek said.

"It's so hard, he's so far away," Brooke said anxiously.

"Come on, Brooke. Focus, you had to notice something," Derek insisted.

Brooke's squeezed her eyes shut as she tried hard to see something. There, she saw him as he looked to see if any cars were coming before pulling into traffic.

"He has very short gray hair. Might have a little bit of black speckled in it. He has a partial mustache and beard, like he hasn't shaved in a few days," she said.

Derek looked at Tara and Luke.

"Brooke, if I showed you a picture, could you identify that man?" Derek asked.

"I … think so," she said.

"Ok, sweetheart, you can open your eyes," Tara said.

"Did it help?" she asked as her eyes darted between the three agents.

"Yes," Tara said as Derek raced out of the conference room.

As he was briskly walking towards Garcia's office, Rossi and J.J. walked out of his office.

"Emily isn't answering," J.J. said.

"If this is who I think it is, he has her too," Derek said.

"Who?" Rossi asked.

"Ian Doyle."

J.J. looked questioningly at Rossi, who looked at her the same way.

"Who's Ian Doyle?" Rossi said.

"Come on, I'll explain on the way to Garcia's office," Derek replied.

(xxxxx)

Spencer felt excruciating pain in his knee. He slowly opened his eyes and winced at the throbbing. By this point, he was sweating and nauseous from the pain.

"Spencer, look at me."

Spencer slowly lifted his head to see a tear-stain faced Emily. He could see the distress in her eyes.

"I am so sorry. This is all my fault. I am so sorry. I tried to protect you. I tried," she said as she began to sob again.

"You didn't know what you were getting yourself into Dr. Reid, when you let this woman into your heart."

Ian came walking back into the room. This time he was pushing some cart that had a silver box and two bars attached to it that looked like drum sticks. Ian began playing with something on the front of the box.

"Ian, you've proven your point. You've already broken me. You win. Please let him go," Emily said desperately.

"The thing with Lauren, oh I'm sorry you know her as Emily. See when I met Emily, she introduced herself as Lauren Reynolds. She led me to believe that she was in love with me. Did she do that to you too, Dr. Reid?"

Spencer looked helplessly at Emily, who looked at him with water filled apologetic eyes.

"I, like yourself, fell for her ruse. I let her into my home and shared my life with her. Did she use sex to coerce you into falling in love with her?"

Spencer looked at Emily with questioning eyes.

"Spencer, no, don't listen to him," Emily said.

"She did, didn't she? Don't worry my friend, I was sucked in by her incredible body and technique as well. There was no one as talented at sucking my dick like she was. Oh, and the way she'd scream in bed. I'd have to warn staff ahead of time so they didn't think she was being hurt," Ian laughed.

Spencer's face was twisted in a mixture of pain and hurt. Emily was sobbing and shaking her head.

"Spencer, please don't listen to him," Emily repeated.

"Anyway, I stupidly asked her to marry me and she accepted. Little did I know this was all a trap and not only would she take away my freedom, but she stole my son from me as well," Ian growled.

He lifted the instruments from the cart and walked behind Spencer. Bending over, he leaned close to Spencer's ear.

"Do you know what she did with him?" Ian paused for dramatic effect. "She murdered him. She shot my sweet boy and his nanny. Your Emily is not only a master manipulator, but she is a murderer."

Emily continued to shake her head no, but could barely breathe anymore as she saw the shock in Spencer's eyes. He looked at her with terror written all over him. Confusion streaming from his eyes.

"So, you can understand why I must do this to you, Dr. Reid. She stole my boy from me and now, I must make her hurt as bad as I have for the past 7 years!" Ian shouted.

Spencer howled behind the tape as the metal drum sticks sent electricity through his body. Ian leaned forward and ripped the tape off Spencer's mouth.

"Let her hear you scream! Let her hear what she has done to you!" Ian yelled.

He zapped Spencer again and smiled when the scream tore through his throat. Emily wanted to hold her ears. The sound of his screaming was too much to bare. She closed her eyes tightly as Spencer let out another shout of pain. Emily didn't even realize she was screaming Spencer's name over and over.

Ian placed the instruments back down and turned the machine off. Without a word, he wheeled the cart from the room. Spencer was drooped to the side. His head flopped lifelessly.

"Spencer, look at me. Please, look at me," Emily pleaded.

Spencer couldn't move. His body was so tight, it was as if he just had a seizure. The slightest movement was agony. His brain was zoning in and out. Trying to decide if it was safer to go unconscious.

"Spencer, if you can hear me, nothing he said about how I feel about you is true. Yes, I was with him and I pretended to love him. But it's because he was a wanted terrorist. I was doing my job. With you … Spencer, what we have is so real.

We have a connection that cannot be faked. You are my world and he knows it. Otherwise he wouldn't torture you. I pray that someone tortures the hell out of Ian. But I would never wish that on you. I love you so much Spencer. It's why I pushed you away.

I knew he was coming back for me and I couldn't let you get hurt. I had to push you away, but it killed me inside. That night … I felt it too. It was the hardest thing to turn my back on you. When I saw you with Brooke my heart was broken.

I wanted that to be us. I didn't want her to be with you. I wanted to go back in time and change my life so that I was worthy of you. I don't deserve you. People like Brooke deserve you. I am so sorry that you ever met me. I should have stayed away from you.

I … I was selfish and I'm sorry. I am so sorry, Spencer," Emily said bursting into tears again.

She sobbed hysterically until she had nothing left. She sat limply in the chair as her eyes grew heavy from distress and exhaustion. She didn't know if Spencer heard a word she said, but she prayed to God that he did.


	9. Chapter 9

_Well based on a lot of the reviews (that I love – thanks) I had to change my line of thinking. I saw this going in a different direction, but I let your ideas and suggestions swim around in my mind for a few days. This is what came from it. Hope you like it!_

 _Enjoy! xoxo_

(xxxxx)

It had been three days since Spencer and Emily were kidnapped. In that time, Spencer had been beaten and tortured. His face was littered with cuts and dried up blood. His knee had swollen so badly that he had lost feeling there. By evening the second day, Spencer had fallen ill.

He was shaking uncontrollably, his teeth chattering. His temperature was sky rocketing with each passing minute. At this point, he just wanted to die. He didn't want to hurt like this anymore. Emily hadn't spoken since the previous day.

She seemed to have fallen into a trance. She just stared at the floor. She stopped responding to Ian's taunts, but tears still streamed from her eyes when Spencer was tortured. She was terribly dehydrated from lack of water and all the vomiting she had done.

Neither of them even flinched when Ian entered the room. They were both exhausted and defeated. They knew the team was looking for them, but they were both beginning to doubt being found in time.

"Dr. Reid, you don't look so good," Ian said feigning concern.

Spencer barely moved when Ian slapped lightly at his face.

"Kill me," Spencer whispered.

"Oh, come now. It's only been three days. There's still plenty of time for me to have fun," Ian replied with a chuckle.

Spencer mumbled something and then began convulsing in the chair. Emily watched in horror as Spencer shook violently from a seizure. After a few moments of bouncing around, he stopped. His head dropped down lifelessly.

Ian reached out and put his hand to Spencer's neck. He shrugged and looked at Emily.

"Not dead yet, but I'd imagine his time is coming. Are you happy with yourself?" Ian said walking towards her.

Emily was so angry and so destroyed by Spencer's state that she couldn't even find words to speak. Ian stood in front of her with a satisfied grin on his face.

"It's been a good run, Emily, but your lies and betrayal have finally caught up to you. Be sure to tell Satan hi for me," he said.

"Ian."

Ian turned to see Spencer glaring at him through his soaking wet hair.

"Well, you recovered quickly," Ian said still grinning.

"Never underestimate a magician," Spencer growled.

"What?" Ian laughed with his brow furrowed.

With that, Spencer's hands swung out from behind him, Ian's gun in his hand. The smile dropped from Ian's face as two shots rang loudly. Ian stumbled backwards and hit the ground hard. Blood pouring from the hole in his chest and head.

Emily's jaw was dropped. "How?" she managed to utter.

"Distraction and slight of hand," Spencer said as he slid from the chair.

"The rope?" Emily said in shock.

"Been working on getting them loose. I've been out since this morning, just had to wait for the perfect opportunity," Spencer said through clenched teeth.

He dragged himself to Ian and patted him down until he found his phone. He flipped the phone open and dialed the most familiar number.

"Hotch, help us," he said.

(xxxxx)

Emily had been released from the hospital after an overnight stay. She had been treated for her dehydration and evaluated by a psychologist before they gave her the go ahead. She stood in Spencer's doorway, debating whether or not to go in and see him.

J.J. told her that his knee had been shattered, so he'd need multiple surgery's. This would easily ground him for months, which he would hate. On top of this he suffered dehydration, stitches for some of the wounds inflicted on him, a fracture to his wrist, and Pneumonia.

Derek also informed her that despite his suffering, he continued to refuse any pain killers other than ibuprofen. Which meant we was in a tremendous amount of pain. Emily finally found the courage and opened the door to his room.

She stepped inside and was startled to see Brooke sitting next to his bed. She was reading to him, but closed the book when she saw Emily. She smiled brightly, though Emily could see she hadn't slept much.

"Emily, hi. How are you feeling?" Brooke asked.

"I'm doing better, thank you," she replied sheepishly.

Emily shot a small glance at Spencer, who just silently stared at her. Brooke noticed the look and got up.

"I'm going to go get something to eat. You want me to bring you back some jello?" she asked.

"Sure, thanks," he said softly.

Brooke smiled at him and gave his hand a gentle squeeze before she left the room. Emily swallowed hard as she shuffled nervously at the end of his bed. Spencer didn't say anything as he watched her.

"I'd ask how you are doing, but I've already been updated," she finally said.

Spencer didn't reply.

"I know you are angry at me. I don't blame you. I can promise you, you don't hate me more than I hate myself," Emily began.

"I don't hate you," Spencer said softly.

Emily looked at him with surprise. He took a deep breath and tried to adjust himself.

"Look, I am furious you kept this secret from me – from us. You were going to just what, deal with it on your own?" he asked.

"I didn't want anyone to get hurt," she said.

"How did that work for you?" he said sarcastically.

"I thought I was protecting all of you … you," she replied pointing to him.

"Emily, you made me think I was crazy and broke my heart. I thought we had a connection and you destroyed that right in front of my face. Then you admit it was all to protect me. I just don't see how breaking someone's heart is any better than breaking someone's knee," he said angrily.

"You're right," she sighed.

There was an awkward silence between the two of them.

"I just wanted to let you know that I'm going away for a while," Emily suddenly blurted.

"What?" Spencer said furrowing his brow.

"All of this, my past, my present – it's all fucked up and I have some thinking to do. I don't know who I am anymore. My entire life I've always played the part that was expected of me. I even pretended to love a terrorist for a job," she said pausing.

"I always thought I was myself here. Around everyone, especially you. But now I just don't know. Now I wonder if I'm just pretending to be someone to fit in with you all. To know that I was capable of hurting someone I love … like I said I'm fucked up. I need to fix this."

Emily's eyes grew watery. She blinked rapidly to try and fight the tears. Spencer watched all of this with no idea what to do or say.

"I want you to know one thing I am sure of. I never used you like Ian said. I did what I did because I cared about you. I never expected to fall in love with you, but it was real. Whether you believe it or not, it was very real for me.

I know I've blown our chance together. You found Brooke now and she's wonderful. She's the kind of girl you deserve in your life. I hope that she takes care of you and treats you well, always," she said holding back her emotions.

"When do you leave?" Spencer asked in a small voice.

"In a few days. I still need to pack, pay out my rental contract, and tie up a few loose ends," she said.

Spencer looked down at his blanket. She could see the wheels in his head turning. He looked up at her with gentle eyes.

"Will I see you again?"

Emily smiled as a tear escaped.

"I don't know. I hope so," she said barely above a whisper.

She waved half-heartedly at him before walking away. Spencer watched her go. His heart torn about what was happening and what to do.

"Bye Emily," he whispered.


	10. Chapter 10

_See notes at the end of the chapter and thanks for reading!_

 _Enjoy! xoxo_

(xxxxx)

It had been 6 weeks since the kidnapping, 4 weeks since Emily left for Europe, 3 weeks since Spencer was released from the hospital, and 1 week since he returned to work. As expected, he wasn't thrilled with being left behind on cases. Penelope was particularly concerned about him.

He spent most of the days at his desk reading or studying cases. The only time he spoke was when he was asked to participate. She even baked him cookies, but he hadn't touched one since she gave it to him.

When the team returned from a case, Penelope pulled Derek aside and shared her concerns. He didn't think it was much to worry about. He figured Spencer was just in pain as well as bitter about being put on desk duty.

To appease her, Derek promised to talk to him and see if he was ok. Spencer was packing up his bag for the day, when Derek reached him.

"Hey, pretty boy. I need a drink, you wanna go with me?" he said leaning on the partition.

"No, I'm good. Thank you though," Spencer said as he grabbed his crutches.

"You got plans with Brooke?" Derek pressed.

"No."

"So, why won't you go with me. We haven't had a brother's night in a while. I need a wing man," Derek joked.

"I just want to go home," Spencer said with a hint of frustration.

"Kid, I'm worried about you. You don't eat much, you don't talk much, and you are spending a lot of time hiding in your house. What's going on? You and Brooke have a fight or something?" Derek said with concern.

"I'm fine, Morgan. Let it go," Spencer said as he got himself up and onto his crutches.

"Is it your leg? Are you upset you can't go into the field?" Derek asked.

"Morgan, seriously, back off," Spencer snapped as he moved towards the exit.

"Reid, give me an hour. That's all I'm asking for. One hour and then you can go back to your cocoon."

Spencer rolled his eyes as he used his crutch to hit the elevator down button.

"You aren't going to let this go, are you?"

"No," Derek said with his arms crossed.

"Fine, one hour. But seriously that's all," Spencer said.

The elevator door opened and Spencer went inside.

"Alright, I'll pick you up in a half-hour," Derek said.

Spencer nodded as the doors closed.

(xxxxx)

Derek took a sip of his beer as his eyes scanned the room. He wasn't really on the hunt for anyone this evening, but he had to play it up.

"She's cute. What do you think," Derek said subtly pointing a girl out.

"Mmmhmm," Spencer replied as he stared at his drink.

"Alright, out with it. I'm done dancing around. Tell me what's going on with you," Derek demanded.

Spencer looked up, startled at the outburst.

"Don't even give me some lame excuse or tell me to let it go," Derek said crossing his arms over his chest.

Spencer sighed and leaned back in his chair. He knew Derek was not going to stop until Spencer told him. He would follow him home and not let him sleep until he said something. He could lie, but ultimately Derek would figure out the lie and hound him twice as bad.

"If I tell you, you have to keep this to yourself. You can't tell anyone," Spencer said.

"Ok," Derek agreed.

"No, I want you to promise me. Promise that you will never tell anyone and I mean _anyone_ ," Spencer said

"Ok, I promise Reid. I won't tell anyone," Derek agreed.

Spencer looked down again as he nervously thought about how to begin. Did he just spit it out or did he lead into it?

"Reid, come on. What's wrong man?" Derek said genuinely concerned.

"I'm not sure how to start this. It's … it's sort of embarrassing," Spencer admitted.

"Look, I know I tease you a lot and give you a hard time, but it's only because I see you as my little brother. If this is something that you are embarrassed by, I assure you I won't make a joke of it. I just want to help you or at the very least understand what's happening to you," Derek said seriously.

Spencer nodded and took a deep breath.

"Ok. Ummm … so, you know how you like to have debates about … like … sexual things?" He paused and glanced at Derek, who nodded his understanding. "Well, I don't … half the time … I don't know what you are talking about. I just pretend I do."

"You're a virgin?" Derek interrupted.

"No, I was only with like one girl and … it was not like what you talk about," Spencer said as his cheeks turned a bright red.

"Understandable," Derek said as he waited for more.

"So, I confided in Emily … about all of this," Spencer stopped and pursed his lips. "She … her suggestion … she thought that maybe she could, umm, help me."

Spencer's heart was pounding as he braced himself for the biggest revelation. He scratched at his head, while clearing his throat.

"How did she help?" Derek asked.

"She … gave me … she gave lessons," Spencer stuttered.

"Lessons?" Derek said furrowing his brow.

"Yea, lessons. She taught me things," Spencer said glancing up through his hair.

"Reid, are you telling me that you and Prentiss had sex?" Derek said bluntly.

Spencer practically turned maroon. He nodded and dropped his head to avoid eye contact.

"Wow, ok, so what happened?" Derek said, clearly surprised by this news.

"So, it started out fine. We both had fun and enjoyed what we were doing, but somewhere along the way it seemed to become more than just … a lesson," Spencer said.

"You fell for her?" Derek said.

"Well, she was giving off signals that it was more than just … casual for her too. One night when I had gone over to her house, I confessed to her that this was starting to feel wrong to me. That I always felt sex should be with the person you love.

Now by this point, I was already falling for her, but she made it clear before that she doesn't do relationships. I told her I was going to leave, but she asked me to stay and it happened. We had this … this like magnetic connection," Spencer described.

"That's love, kid," Derek said with a small smile.

Spencer seemed to think about this before continuing.

"Yea, but she got a call and that was it. She pretended nothing happened and I figured I was stupid for thinking someone as beautiful as Emily, would want me. It was then I met Brooke and for once I felt on the same page as someone. I liked her and I knew she liked me. There was no guessing or insecurities."

"But you don't love her. You love Emily," Derek stated matter-of-factly.

Spencer looked up with him. Confusion was written all over his face. He frowned and began to chew on his bottom lip.

"Reid, Brooke is wonderful. She is a sweet girl and she treats you well, but the reason you are so miserable is you don't want to be with her. You want to be with Emily," Derek said.

"But Emily … she lied to me. She made me feel stupid and humiliated. She nearly got both of us killed because of her lie. How can I just be ok with that and forgive her?" Spencer said angrily.

"I understand your feelings of betrayal. I am angry with her for not telling us what was going on with Ian Doyle as well. That being said, she didn't do it out of malice. Spencer, she did what she thought was right. She sacrificed being happy with you to protect you," Derek tried to explain.

"Sacrificed being happy?" Spencer snapped.

"Yes, she sacrificed being happy. Do you think it was easy for her to sit back and watch you with Brooke? Imagine how you would feel watching her with another man," Derek said.

"But it's her fault I was with another girl! It could have been her! I would've protected her! I would've died for her, but she didn't even give me the chance!" Spencer said angrily.

"I get it Reid. I really do, but look at what this is doing to you. You don't eat, you don't talk, you don't sleep. How is this any better than forgiving her and letting her back in?" Derek said calmly.

Spencer pursed his lips as the words sunk in. He looked up at the ceiling and then back down at his drink.

"Whether you like it or not, pretty boy, your heart has already decided what it wants. You can choose to ignore it and suffer the consequences, or you can forgive her and possibly find the happiness you've always wanted."

Spencer rubbed his hands over his face and through his hair. He didn't know what to do and felt more conflicted than ever. He folded his arms on top of the table and slammed his head on top of them. He felt Derek pat his back sympathetically.

(xxxxx)

 _A/N: it seemed that most of you wanted Spencer to end up with Emily again. So, without giving away much, at some point I will make a new story with the character Brooke. I really like her and I have some ideas of a relationship for her and Spencer. Thanks for the feedback as always!_


	11. Chapter 11

_See notes at the end of the chapter and thanks for reading!_

 _Enjoy! xoxo_

(xxxxx)

Spencer stood outside Brooke's house. His hands were shaking and he was talking quietly to himself. He jumped in surprise when her front door swung open.

"Spencer? What are you doing here?" Brooke asked with concern. "Are you alright?"

Spencer nodded and began stuttering.

"I … I'm sorry to bother you. Um, I just … I … do you … can we talk?" he said visibly shaking.

"Sure, come on in," she said stepping aside.

Spencer walked into the house and to the living room he'd become familiar with the past couple of weeks.

"Can I get you anything to drink?" she offered.

"Um, no … thank you," he said.

Brooke walked over to the couch and sat down. She patted the seat nearby.

"Sit down, you look like you are about to have a seizure," she said.

Spencer gave a pretend smile and sat down. His hands nervously rubbing his pants.

"Spencer, is this about Emily?" Brooke said softly.

"What?" he said looking up in shock.

Brooke didn't respond, she just smiled softly at him. Spencer looked down at his feet.

"Yea," he said guiltily.

"I'm not surprised," Brooke said making Spencer look up. "I see the way you two look at each other and I overheard some of what Emily said at the hospital."

"Brooke, I'm incredibly sorry," Spencer said guilt ridden.

"Did you ever cheat on me?" she asked.

"What? No, never," Spencer said shocked by the question.

"Then you have nothing to be sorry about," she said smiling sweetly. "I'm not going to lie and say this doesn't hurt, but our hearts want what they want."

Spencer frowned and reached out for Brooke's hand.

"You are an amazing woman Brooke and I wish things were different. You are so kind and smart and loving and beautiful. I have enjoyed my time with you, I hope you know that," Spencer said with sincerity.

"Thank you. You are an amazing man yourself. Give yourself more credit," Brooke said squeezing his hand.

"Can we be friends?" he asked.

Brooke gave him a small smile. "Probably not right now. I don't think I could handle seeing you with someone else. In time when my heart heals and moves on, I would love to be your friend."

Spencer nodded his understanding. He stood up and walked over to Brooke's door. He stopped and turned around.

"Bye," he said before leaning over and gently kissing her cheek.

"Bye Spencer," Brooke replied as a tear dripped from her eye.

(xxxxx)

Emily stepped onto her balcony that overlooked Paris. The Eiffel Tower glittering in the distance. She looked up at the stars blinking over her and sighed. She had been gone a little over a month and traveled a new place every week. She started in England, next came Ireland, then Germany, then Greece, and now she was staying in France.

She hadn't been in contact with anyone back home, not because she _didn't_ miss them terribly, but _because_ she missed them terribly. The thought of talking to them would only break her heart more. She could still see Penelope and J.J. crying as she boarded her plane.

At first, she thought about flying home to stay with her mother, but the idea of having to make nice with dignitaries was the last thing she wanted to do right now. She considered finding one place to stay in and call home, but nowhere felt home to her. So, for now, staying in hotels was enough for her.

As she thought of home, she was interrupted by a knock on the door. Her FBI instincts kicked in and she hesitated. There was another knock on the door as she went to her bag to get her gun. She slowly walked over to the door, but whoever was behind the door had placed their thumb over the peephole.

Her heart rate sky rocketed and adrenaline started to kick in. The person knocked again. Emily cocked her gun, took a deep breath, and opened the door. Her mouth dropped in disbelief and she lowered the gun, and put it back to safety.

"Spencer?" she said in shock.

There in front of her in a gray suit and purple shirt, just like he wore to work, stood Spencer. His hair had grown out a bit. Pieces of his locks hung over his eyes.

"What are you doing here?" she said barely above a whisper.

"I needed to see you," he replied.

"How did you find me?" Emily said still in shock.

"Garcia, of course," Spencer said. "May I come in?"

Emily snapped out of her trance and moved to the side allowing Spencer in. She shut the door and locked it up with the chains.

"You almost got shot you know," Emily said as she put her gun on the dresser.

"I was afraid if you saw who it was, you wouldn't answer," he said as he looked around the room.

"Spence, why are you here?" she repeated.

He stopped surveying the room and turned to her.

"Emily, I … " he looked to be second guessing himself. "We never finished our lessons."

His cheeks turned slightly pink, but he held eye contact with her. Emily furrowed her brow in confusion.

"You came all this way for me to give you sex pointers to use on your girlfriend?" she said in disbelief.

"Yes," he said calmly.

Emily's jaw dropped and her face grew red with anger.

"You searched me out, flew to Paris, came to _my_ hotel, knocked on _my_ door, all so you can impress your girlfriend?" she said infuriated.

Spencer stepped forward, but Emily swatted his hands away and stepped back.

"Spencer, I realize that I made some mistakes, but this … this is just fucked up and incredibly cruel. I want you to leave now. Go. Go back to America where your perfect girlfriend is waiting for you," she said as she fought the tears that welled up in her eyes.

"My girlfriend isn't in America, right now," Spencer replied in a soft voice.

"Oh, great! She's traveling! That must make cheating on her ok," Emily fumed.

"She's in Paris at the moment," he said.

"Oh! Wow, this just keeps getting better and better. Brooke is in Paris with you and you search me out for a booty call?" she said practically growling.

"No Brooke is back in Virginia," Spencer said.

Emily stopped her pacing and looked at him with daggers.

"If Brooke is in Virginia, then who the hell are you here with?" she said exasperated.

"I'm here by myself."

"Spencer, that doesn't make any sense! If you are here alone, but your girlfriend is in Paris, who …" she trailed off as it started to make sense.

Emily looked to Spencer who had a small smile on his face.

"Wait … what?" she whispered, suddenly breathless.

"Not a day has gone by that I haven't thought about you. Letting you walk away was the hardest and stupidest thing I've ever done," he started. "Brooke was a great girl, but she wasn't you. When I see you, my heart starts to race and my stomach flutters from excitement. When you are with me, I feel whole."

"Spencer, that's just because we had sex together," she said, not wanting to believe his words out of fear. "You think that you want to be with me, but the lust will wear off."

"No, Emily! No, it's not lust," he said grabbing her hands. "Yes, sex with you is incredible, but it's deeper than that. If we never had sex again, I would still want to be with you because you make me feel complete. When I'm with you, everything feels right. You are the missing puzzle piece I've always been searching for."

Emily looked down at her feet. Spencer could see the tears dripping onto the floor.

"Please, believe me when I tell you that I love you, Emily. This is not lust and it's not just going to go away. I know my heart and I know the difference," he said.

Emily's shoulders bounced as she started crying harder. He heard her take a deep breath and she finally looked up at him. Their eyes searching one another's. He waited for her to say something.

"So, are you saying no sex ever again," she said, jokingly.

Spencer laughed and pulled her into his arms. His mouth crashing into hers. Sparks shot from the tops of their heads, straight down to their toes. Spencer pulled away first.

"I am sorry for everything," he whispered.

"You have nothing to be sorry about," she said placing a hand on his cheek.

Spencer smiled as he leaned into her touch.

"So, you want to learn something new in Paris?" Emily said with a grin.

"No. Tonight, I just want to make love to my girlfriend," he said before pulling her back into his arms.

(xxxxx)

The door shut to the hotel room startling Emily. Her eyes popped open and she blinked rapidly to adjust to the light shining into the room. She was still snuggled under the fluffy hotel blanket, naked from the night before.

"Good morning," Spencer said as he carried a tray over to the table.

He was in his blue and green plaid pajama bottoms, but his shirt still laid on the floor from the second go around.

"I ordered some breakfast," he said before popping a strawberry into his mouth.

"It looks good," she said not moving from her spot.

Spencer grabbed a strawberry and climbed onto the bed. He held it over her mouth, teasing her. Finally, she snatched it from his grip.

"That is good," she said smiling.

"You shouldn't lay down when you are eating. You could choke," he said.

Emily sighed and sat up, the comforter not going with her.

"Bring the bowl over," she said eyeing the dish of fruit.

Spencer sat up and grabbed the fruit. The two sat in blissful silence while they ate. Emily reached out at one point and ran her fingers through his hair.

"Your hair has gotten longer," she said.

"Does it look alright?" he said a bit self-conscious.

"You look sexy no matter how your hair is," she said popping a grape into her mouth.

Spencer blushed as he turned his attention back to the fruit bowl.

"Spence, can I ask you something?"

Spencer nodded.

"That night we had our first … moment, I guess you could say," she began and he nodded. "You said there was something that Derek was talking about, but you didn't know what it was. What was it?"

"I know what it is now. I looked it up on the computer. It's amazing the number of people willing to share photos of themselves in such intimate moments," he said shaking his head.

"Ok, that's kind of hot you looked at nudes," she said grinning.

"I didn't look Em. As soon as I saw the first photo I closed the computer immediately," he said.

"Anyway, what was it?" she tried again.

He started blushing a deep red.

"How can you still be shy about this around me?" she said shoving his shoulder playfully.

"I don't know, I just get … nervous still. I'm sure it stems from the incident I had as a child," he said looking at the cantaloupe he was playing with.

"Do you want to tell me about it?" she asked gently.

"Not now, no. Someday perhaps," he replied.

He took a deep breath trying to gain courage to speak it.

"So, that day at work I was reading a cold case and doing some equations to see if I could figure anything out. Morgan came over to see if I wanted to go to lunch and looked at my paper. He got this grin on his face and pointed at a number, before laughing suggestively.

I, obviously, had no clue what was so funny. Nor did I get the innuendo. So, I figured I'd ask you. I don't even know if it's something people do regularly or not," he said now fiddling with a string on the comforter.

"69," Emily said softly.

Spencer nodded and again looked embarrassed.

"As with anything, it's dependent on a couple's preferences. I don't particularly care for it, but I've done it and it still feels good," she said.

"Oh, ok," he said still avoiding eye contact.

"It's probably easiest if I'm on top," she said grabbing the bowl and moving it to the table.

"What? You don't like it. We don't need to do that," he insisted almost in a panic.

She walked over and sat down next to him.

"Spence, first take a deep breath," she said and he obeyed. "It is not a top choice of mine, but doesn't mean I won't do it or won't like it. Oral is oral, baby. It feels good either way. I just prefer watching my lover enjoy getting head."

"Head?" he said furrowing his brow.

"Blow job."

He ah'd her response.

"I want you to experience everything at least once. You need to find what your favorite thing is too. This isn't all about me," she said climbing onto his lap.

Not waiting for him to respond, she began kissing him. His hands braced her back so she wouldn't fall, while her hands ran through his hair, tugging gently.

"Oh, I could get used to this hair," she said grinning against his mouth.

She felt him smile before resuming his exploration. Emily waited until she felt his hardness beneath her. She climbed off his lap and patted the bed where she wanted him to lay. Spencer nervously pulled off his pajama pants and surprisingly had nothing underneath.

"Oh commando. I like that," she said reaching out to stroke him.

"I figured I wouldn't need them much," he gasped.

"Ok, lay down. I'm going to climb on top of you and the rest is obvious. Just do what you typically do," she said.

Spence immediately began his caressing as Emily now applied her mouth to him. He let out a hiss as she licked the throbbing vein. He almost got caught up in his own enjoyment that he nearly abandoned his end of the job.

He started off with gentle rubs that elicited moans from Emily, though she never stopped working him. Soon the two of them were aching for release and feverishly working each other. Spencer was the first to give in. He didn't mean to, but his head dropped and he let out a groan.

Emily sat up and turned to face him. He started to panic, but before he could say anything Emily climbed over his head putting his mouth back onto her. She held onto the headboard as he licked and sucked on her.

She began moaning above him. Her hands gripping the bars so tightly they were turning red. The sounds she was making surely must be disturbing the neighbors. He hoped because it was a presidential suite that the sound muffled a bit.

Emily let out a loud grunt as she reached her climax. Spencer held her tightly to his mouth still. Letting her ride the wave. After she felt completely finished, she dropped onto the bed next to him. She was panting heavily and her eyes were closed.

Spencer wanted to speak, but was afraid to say anything. He wasn't sure if her silence was a good thing or a bad thing. Sure, she orgasmed, but she had to change position to do so.

"Phewwww," she sighed. "I guess when you do that with the right guy it's not half bad."

"You liked it?" he asked timidly.

"Um, did you not hear those noises you brought out of me?" she said looking at him.

"I'm pretty sure the neighbors heard too," he said grinning.

"It's the city of love, what do they expect," she said closing her eyes again. "Did you like it?"

"Yes, but I agree with you. I love watching your face when I do that," he said giving her a quick kiss.

"See, you're already making notes of what works for you," she said.

Spencer smiled and pulled the covers back over their bodies. He scooted closer to her and held her in the spooning position. Emily felt him kiss the back of her head.

"I love you, Emily," he whispered.

"I love you too, baby," she said.

(xxxxx)

Well that was a long chapter. Hope you enjoyed it. I had some road blocks writing it, but I think I got back on the track I wanted originally. We will see what more these two get into – besides each other haha.


	12. Chapter 12

_Sorry for the delay in updates. I felt stuck on where to go proceed with this story. It was meant to be PWP and I was stuck with an idea of where to go with the story. I think I've got an idea set in motion, but should you have any thoughts or requests PM me._

 _Also thanks for the well wishes regarding the Hurricane. We evacuated and had wound up having a nice family vacation. Our home suffered no damage, only some debris cleanup._

 _Enjoy! xoxo_

(xxxxx)

Emily had been home a little over a week. Derek kept his word and never spoke of what Spencer told him. Not even Penelope knew. Spencer and Emily were able to keep things professional as they always were. The only thing that changed was Derek sharing his two cents now and then of sexual experiments that Spencer should try. Which usually ended with Spencer glaring at Derek or Emily slapping him in the back of the head while casually passing by.

It had been a particularly boring week at work. The government was in the midst of a nasty scandal, which led to more time spent in the office. Spencer had been filling up his cup of coffee, when he saw Emily enter the room.

"Coffee?" he asked as he added more sugar to his cup.

"I should ask you the same question," she said causing Spencer to give her a questioning look. "Think you have enough sugar in there?"

Spencer looked at his cup and then back at her.

"I always make my coffee this way," he replied.

"Doesn't make it right," she teased. "But to answer your question, no coffee for me. Thank you though."

Emily walked over to the fridge, opened it, and took out a bottle of water. She leaned on the counter and took a sip. When she opened her eyes, she noticed Spencer staring at her. She gave him a flirty smile.

"See something you like?" she said in a lower voice.

"Do I ever," he replied.

Emily suddenly got a devilish look in her eye.

"Uh oh, I know that look," Spencer said. "What are you up to?"

"Well, I just wondered if you've ever had playtime at work?" she asked, though she knew the answer.

Spencer's face turned pink and he coughed a bit on the coffee he swallowed incorrectly.

"Emily, we can't … no. We can't do that," he said putting his cup down.

"Why not?" Emily pouted.

"If we get caught, we get fired," Spencer said as if this should've been obvious.

"So, we don't get caught," she smirked.

"No, Emily, no," Spencer said as she walked closer to him.

"I know for a fact there are no cameras in the records room. I casually request your help on a cold case and we go to that room together. We come back within 20 minutes or so and nobody will be the wiser," she said quietly.

Spencer looked around the room anxiously. His brain was telling him no, but his dick, that was starting to harden at the thought, was screaming yes. _Why did sex have to be so difficult to refuse?_ Spencer ran his fingers through his hair.

"I don't know," he said.

"I wouldn't take the risk if I wasn't sure we could get away with it. Look around, it's not busy. A lot of people took time off because of the government black out. I know how to jam the lock on the inside. This way we know if someone is trying to come in, but they won't because that room is rarely used," Emily explained.

Spencer gave Emily a pleading look.

"Trust me," she said holding out her hand for his.

Spencer looked at it for a moment and sighed.

"Alright, I'll try, but if I get really freaked out can we stop?" he asked.

"Yes. If you ask to stop, we will stop. I promise," Emily said.

He could see the excitement in her eyes and it made him smile shyly.

"Ok, let's go."

They went back to their desks and began working on their paperwork again. Derek yawned loudly, while the muffled music Luke was listening to seeped out of his earbuds. J.J. was in a meeting with Rossi, while Hotch was stuck on conference calls.

"Hey Reid, can you take a look at this? There's something familiar about it. I feel like I've heard of a similar case before," Emily said as she handed him a manila folder.

Spencer took the folder and flipped it open. He skimmed over it and looked back up at Emily.

"I think you could be right. You wanna go check the records room? I think there's a box in there that might help us," he said nervously.

"Yea, let's go," she said getting up and walking off as if this were real.

Spencer stood up to follow her and noticed Derek and Luke hadn't even glanced their way. He felt a bit of pride that he pulled that act off, considering how much he was shaking on the inside. Spencer caught up with Emily in the hallway. They walked for a few minutes until they reached the room.

Emily pulled her keys from her pocket and opened the door. Spencer went inside and heard the door shut behind him. Emily began tinkering with something before she turned to face him.

"Alright, the bolt is jammed," she grinned.

Without another word, she grabbed Spencer's hand and pulled him away from the door. They passed ten rows of shelving before she turned and walked towards the back of the room. Spencer realized she was taking them towards a small section that had a table for workers to look over the items of boxes and files without taking them back to their desk.

Emily quickly shimmied up onto the table and grabbed Spencer's tie. She didn't want him to over think it, so she immediately began kissing him. While their tongues played with one another, she started unbuckling his belt. She could feel his hesitation.

"It's ok, I promise," she whispered as she pushed his pants down around his ankles.

Emily quickly undid her own pants and threw them to the floor. Spencer noticed that she kept her underwear on. She saw him eyeing them.

"I know this sounds stupid considering I'm asking you to fuck me at work, but it just seems wrong for my bare ass to be on the table," she said.

Spencer gave a small laugh at her reasoning, but slid them to the side and shoved his fingers straight into her. Emily let out a yelp as she wasn't expecting that.

"Shhhh," Spencer said furrowing his brow.

"Sorry, you caught me off guard," she responded.

Spencer nodded before kissing her again to help drown out the sounds. Emily gently massaged his throbbing cock as he continued to finger bang her. She finally broke the kiss, panting.

"Fuck me," she said.

"You know I hate that word," he said as he removed his fingers.

"I know babe, but there's a difference between making love and fucking. What we are doing right now is qualified as fucking. Whether you like the word or not, it's what we are doing," Emily said as she slid closer to the end of the table.

Spencer didn't respond, but he did line himself up with her glistening opening.

"Uhhh, I wish we had more time," Spencer moaned. "You look so good."

With that Emily pulled him to her mouth and began to kiss him feverishly. She bit his lip when he first pushed into her. Her hands clawed at his dress shirt. Had he been shirtless he would've been covered in scratches and fingernail marks.

Spencer thrusted rapidly into Emily as the two of them tried desperately not to make any sounds. All that could be heard was the slapping of skin against skin and their kissing. Occasionally one of them would let a small moan slip, but it wasn't loud enough to cause a passerby to stop.

"Uhhhh, Spence, I want more of you," Emily whined softly.

"I know baby, I know. Me too," he said breathlessly as he continued to pound into her.

His arms were wrapped around her waist, her body bouncing around on the table with each thrust. Spencer normally tried to hold out for Emily, but he still worried about being caught so when he felt himself at the edge he released with a sigh and a grunt. Emily continued to move herself on him until he slid out.

As Spencer quickly started to dress again, he looked up in shock to see Emily's right hand massaging her clit rapidly. He managed to pull up his briefs, but his pants still sat around his ankles. He was enthralled by the sight of Emily masturbating.

She was lying flat on the table, her back arched and her head tilted upward. Her mouth was dropped open in pleasure as her hand worked furious circles. Spencer wanted to join in and help her, but he was frozen in ecstasy. It was so unbelievably hot, he couldn't move.

He watched how she pleasured herself, committing it to memory. His heart raced as he watched her squirm under her own fingers. Finally, he saw her legs begin to shake and her stomach muscles tighten. Her hand was moving so quickly it looked frantic. With that, she let out all the air she'd been holding in and moaned her approval.

She did that three more times before she finally lay lifeless on the table. Giving herself a few minutes to catch her breath, she sat up and looked at Spencer.

"You alright?" she asked.

"Emily, that … was the most … beautiful thing I've ever seen," he said still in awe.

Emily blushed as she climbed off the table.

"Well, maybe if you are a good boy, I'll do it again sometime for you," she said as she gave him a gentle kiss.

Spencer watched her redress. He was still in a daze by her. She was one amazing woman. She never ceased to amaze him.


	13. Chapter 13

_Not going to lie – this has to be my favorite chapter so far. I don't know where this came from, as I was going to have a Derek walks in on them scene – and this came to be! I hope you like it as much as I do!_

 _Thanks for the support and the comments! You all make this worth it! xoxo_

(xxxxx)

The car rocked back and forth in the darkened, abandoned parking lot. A few cars drove by here and there, but most of the town was sound asleep. The team had finished a case and were meeting at the airstrip in an hour.

Most of the team decided to go get dinner before making the trip home, while Spencer decided he wanted to make a quick stop to see his mom. Emily offered to go with him, which raised only Derek's eyebrows.

On the way back from seeing his mom, Emily started getting handsy. While Spencer tried to focus on the road, she had pulled down his zipper and introduced him to road head. He tried to focus, but after nearly driving off the road, he pulled into a parking lot to have his way with her.

It started in the front seat, but they eventually moved to the backseat, where Spencer now dominated Emily. Her legs were awkwardly bent as he slammed into her. Steam covered the windows as sweat poured from their bodies.

Emily had taken it into her own hands to rub herself, while he focused on penetrating her over and over again. His arms were beginning to tire from holding himself up and she was starting to grow stiff of the folded lawn chair position. Neither complained though. They both groaned and grunted their enjoyment.

Suddenly the phone rang, scaring the both of them.

"Shit!" Spencer cried as he nearly fell off the seat.

"No, fuck! I was so close," Emily sighed.

Spencer reached over the middle console and looked at the caller. He tried to calm his breathing as best as possible.

"Yea?" he said putting the phone to his ear.

"Where are you two? You were supposed to be here 20 minutes ago," Derek said.

"We got held up with mom. She was having a bad night," Spencer lied.

"Yea, save that story for Hotch. Now pull up your pants and get your ass to the plane before people start questioning you two. And do a mirror check before you board," Derek said.

Spencer couldn't see him, obviously, but he knew that Derek was laughing at them.

"We'll be there soon," he said before hanging up.

He looked to Emily who was already zipping up her pants.

"Sorry," he said frowning.

She looked disappointed and maybe even a little pissed, but she smiled at him.

"Not your fault. Come on, let's get a move on it," she said as she climbed back up front.

Spencer sighed as he pulled his pants up, but quickly had the car moving towards the airport.

(xxxxx)

On the plane, everyone had fallen asleep, including Emily. No one had suspected Spencer's story to be a lie. They were all actually sad that his visit turned out to be depressing. Little did they know that his mom had a great day and was incredibly lucid.

Spencer couldn't sleep, so he flipped open a book and began reading.

"You ok?"

Spencer looked across the table to see Derek looking at him. He had taken off his headphones and let them rest around his neck.

"Yea, just not tired I guess," he said softly.

"Surprising," Derek said with a knowing smile.

Spencer rolled his eyes. With that Derek leaned forward across the table, waving Spencer closer.

"So, look. I know this is none of my business, but I thought of something. I was thinking of this situation with you and Emily," he started.

"You think about what Emily and I are doing?" Spencer said with a scrunched face.

"No, not the actual act. That's fucking gross. No, I had this moment the other day when I remembered something you told me and well, I had this thought that maybe Emily could help you with that," Derek said.

"This is an incredibly strange conversation," Spencer said.

"Here me out. It's something I think will be beneficial to your past. Something to help you let go of some of the pain and hurt," Derek said seriously.

This caught Spencer's attention. "Ok, you've peeked my interest."

"You've always had a hard time letting go of your childhood memories. They were filled with abuse at home and abuse at school. You couldn't get away from it no matter where you turned. So, I was thinking, what if there was a way to get past one of those haunting moments?"

"Still listening," Spencer said.

"What if you have Emily recreate that day with Alexa?"

"What?" Spencer said loudly and then looked around the plane nervously.

They waited a few moments, before Derek started whispering again.

"Change the past Reid. Have Emily tell you she's waiting for you, you go to her, she ties you up, and then well, you know the rest. Turn that memory into something beautiful, sexy. Something that won't haunt you anymore," Derek suggested.

Spencer nervously fiddled with his book. His heart was racing at the memory of that day. How scared and humiliated he felt. The one time in his life he actually contemplated suicide. He chewed his lip and tried to push the pain away.

"I really think it would do wonders for you," Derek said, breaking his thoughts.

"I don't know," Spencer said with a broken voice.

"Just think about it kid. I know Emily would help you and she wouldn't let you down," Derek said before pulling the headphones back over his ears and shutting his eyes.

Spencer looked over at the couch where Emily was curled up sound asleep. He knew he could trust her, he did. But he didn't know if he could trust himself with those memories being as powerful as they were. He didn't know if he'd be able to go through with it.

(xxxxx)

Spencer sat at his desk writing an article for a local college newspaper, when he heard a knock on his door. He dropped his pen, stood up, and walked to the door. He was happy to see Emily standing before him, despite not knowing she was coming over.

"This is a nice surprise," he said moving aside to let her in.

"Hope I'm not interrupting," she said as she walked in and placed her purse down on the table near the door.

"Not at all. Everything alright?" he asked.

"Yea, all is well with me. You?" she said as she walked over to the couch and sat down.

Spencer nodded and sat down next to her.

"So, what do I owe the pleasure?" he said.

"Well, I've been debating whether or not to say anything, but after a lot of thought I feel like I need to," she began.

"Oh geez, did someone find out about us? Are you pregnant?" he said as his heart pounded.

Emily laughed and put her hand on top of his, pushing it down to his knee.

"No, Spence. It's not like that," she said and watched as he visibly relaxed. "The other night on the plane, I sort of overheard you and Derek talking. I didn't catch all of it, but enough to let you know I'm willing to do it, if you need me to."

Spencer turned pale. Emily suddenly regretted the decision to talk to him about it.

"I'm sorry, I just assumed that you were afraid to ask me," she began.

"No, I wasn't afraid to ask you," he said as he looked down at his feet.

"Oh … is it me? Are you afraid to trust me?" she asked with a hint of insecurity.

"No, not at all. Emily, I trust you with my life," he said.

"Then, what is it? I can help you. I want to help you," she said softly.

Spencer got up and paced the living room. He ran a hand through his messy curls and started chewing on his lips again.

"Emily, you don't know how hard it is for me to relive that moment in my mind as if it were a movie. I can't just willingly step back into the single most traumatizing day of my life," he said almost angrily.

He stopped moving and sat back down with his head in his hands.

"It was awful," he said as he choked up.

"Then please Spencer. Please let me help you. Let me help erase what those evil kids did to you. Take the power away from them. Show them the unimaginably brave man I know you are. I promise it will be worth it. It might be terrifying at first, but it's just me. I won't hurt you. I won't let anything bad happen to you. I swear on my life," Emily said as he felt her hands rest on his leg closest to her.

"I don't know," he said as he rubbed his face.

"Put your faith in me. I won't let you down," she whispered.

(xxxxx)

An hour later, Spencer stood nervously in his kitchen. His hands were shaking and he felt sick to his stomach. His phone pinged and he looked down to see a text message. He opened it and read: _**Hey Spencer. Emily Prentiss asked me to tell you to meet her outside at the football field. She told me she thinks that you're cute.**_

Spencer closed the text and placed his phone on the counter. He slowly walked out into the living room and his imagination began to take control. He felt like a child again. He could see the vast field in front of him. His heart was racing. He saw the metal bleachers and a girl with her back to him. He stopped in his tracks and felt his breathing increase.

The girl turned around and smiled at him. She waved him forward, but he couldn't move his feet. He swallowed hard and felt his stomach drop. This is where the entire football team and cheerleaders come out and surround him. He started looking around anxiously, when he heard the girl talking to him.

"Spence, look at me. It's ok, it's just me. You are safe. Look at me."

He looked at the voice and saw Emily. The football field was gone and he stood in his living room. He realized Emily's hands were on his cheeks and she was watching him carefully. He gave her a small 'I'm ok' smile and took a deep breath.

Emily watched him a moment longer before she stepped back towards the couch and smiled at him. The football field reappeared and this time he only saw Emily. She looked cute in the cheer outfit she was wearing. The white skirt had maroon and gold trim, while the top had the same pattern, but a giant G was in the center. Her hair was up in a high ponytail and she wore cute plain white sneakers.

"Hi, I'm glad you came," she said shyly.

"I'm glad you invited me," he whispered.

"So, I guess you know I have a crush on you," Emily said as she stared down at her feet, that shuffled nervously beneath her.

Spencer nodded and then realized she wasn't looking at him. "Um, yea. Yea, I, uh, I got a text."

He wasn't as great at improvising as Emily, but since this felt so real, he was able to do a good enough job to keep the role play going.

"Do _you_?" Emily asked glancing up at him through her lashes.

"Do I what?" he said nervously.

"Do you … like me?" she said with hesitation, as if he was going to humiliate her.

"Yes, very much so," he replied.

Emily gave him a big grin and moved slowly closer.

"Can I … would it be alright, if I kissed you?" she said when she was inches from him.

Spencer tried to think of something to say, but ultimately, he just decided to close his mouth and nod his approval. Emily timidly stepped closer until she was standing just beneath him. She looked up into his eyes and moved her face closer to his.

They both closed their eyes and when their lips met, all the worry and fear Spencer had up to this point faded. He sunk into the kiss, allowing himself to fully enjoy kissing Emily as if this was the first time they'd ever done this. When they broke, Emily had rosy cheeks that made Spencer blush as well.

"Spencer, I know this is sudden, but I've been dreaming of this moment with you from the first time I saw you. I'd like to try something, but I'm asking for your full trust," Emily said, stilling playing the part.

Spencer felt the confidence slip away as he realized they were at the next step of the role play.

"Look at me," she demanded and he obeyed. "It'll be ok. I promise."

He saw the truth in her eyes. He nodded and she turned around to grab something off the couch. He looked at the black silky fabric she held in her hand. She took his hand and led him over to the couch. He sat down, but felt his fear over taking him. His hands were shaking again, his breathing increasing, and his heart rate doubling.

Emily went behind the couch for a moment and leaned over his shoulder. She placed her lips gently on his neck and whispered, "I won't hurt you. I promise."

Spencer swallowed hard as the fabric went over his eyes. He felt her tie it tightly. For a moment, he panicked. There was no sound and his imagination went wild.

"Emily. Emily! Take it off! Emily!" he started calling out.

"It's ok, Spence. I'm right here. It's just you and me," Emily said as she sat down next to him and pulled him into her arms. "Take a deep breath. I'm right here. You are safe, love."

The word caught him off guard. His heart stopped for a second as he let that sink in. Emily just called him love. She never said that before and that wasn't her role playing voice. That was her actual voice.

"Are you alright?" she asked him as he sat back up.

"Yea," he said, glossing over the word for now.

"Ok, I'm going to continue then," she said.

He knew she was giving him a moment to tell her if he wanted her to stop, but something about her calling him love, made him feel stronger. He gave a small nod of approval. With that Emily climbed onto him. Her legs straddling his lap.

He went to put his hands on her waist, but she grabbed them and put them at his side.

"Not yet," she whispered as she held them there.

She gave his ear lobe a lick, before moving forward and teasing his mouth. She was close enough that he could feel her breath, but she backed up every time he tried to reach for her. He heard the rustling of clothes and figured she was taking something off.

After doing so, she unbuttoned his shirt. She gave him a moment to take it off fully. He was starting to forget all about his bad memories as his hormones began to rage. He felt Emily's hand massage up his chest, down his arms, and through his hair. It felt amazing!

"Do you want to feel me?" she whispered as her mouth brushed momentarily across his.

"Yes," he said as he nodded. "Please."

Emily grabbed his hands and placed them on her stomach. She slowly moved them upwards, but stopped just below the breasts.

"Oh, Emily, please," he begged breathlessly.

"What? What do you want? Tell me," she said.

"I want to taste you," he said.

"More, tell me what exactly you want," she said as she squeezed his hands and pressed them against her ribs.

"I want to suck on your breasts. I want to feel them in my hand and the warmth against my tongue," he said with need.

It was here the fantasy broke and they both were driven by pure desire for each other. Emily rose a bit higher and pressed his face in between her breasts. Spencer groaned as he lifted his hands and squashed himself between them. His one hand squeezed and massaged her as he moved his mouth to latch around her nipple.

Emily cradled him against her as he sucked and bit her. She made sure to be incredibly vocal for him, as it was all about his senses.

"That feels so good. I love your mouth on my body," she said as she clutched his hair in her hands.

Without warning, Spencer pulled her roughly down onto his lap and searched out her mouth. He kissed her feverishly as he grinded her against the bulge in his pants.

"Emily, I can't hold out much longer. I need you," he said as he placed kisses all along her neck.

"Tell me. Tell me what you want," she said as she slid her body along his covered dick.

"I need …" he hesitated.

"Say it! Say it Spencer! Tell me you want to fuck me!" Emily cried as she tugged roughly on his hair.

"I … I …"

"Say it!" she said as she pressed harder against him.

"I want to fuck you! I want your dripping wet pussy on my rock-hard dick!" he shouted uncharacteristically.

Emily wasn't sure if she was more shocked or more turned on. It was a close one. She immediately went for his belt, unbuckled it and slid them down his lift hips. She stripped her panties away, leaving the skirt, and climbed back on his lap.

He easily slid inside of her. Both of them crying out loudly with relief. Spencer started lifting his hips off the couch, while Emily bounced up and down on top of him.

"Emily, you feel so good. You are so fucking amazing," he said before Emily pressed her lips to his.

Their tongues fighting furiously against each other. Emily stopped bouncing and pulled Spencer into her chest. She began grinding herself against him. Her body still sliding up and down his shaft, while her clit rubbed against his skin.

Clutching each other tightly the two rubbed bodies in an ecstasy and closeness that they'd never felt before in their lives.

"Oh, Spencer … uhhhhhh …."

"So good, keep going. Feels so good," Spencer moaned with her.

"I'm almost there, fuck, oh shit … harder baby, harder," she said as they grinded together.

"I'm almost there too," Spencer gasped.

Spencer still blindfolded and Emily with her eyes squeezed shut in pure erotic pleasure, they both reached their climax simultaneously. Both of them crying out as they released together. Emily collapsed against Spencer's chest dizzy. Spencer's head flopped back on the couch as he saw bursts of white behind the blindfold.

Their hearts pounded against their chests. After a few moments, Spencer felt Emily sliding the blindfold off his face. He looked at her and felt overwhelmed with emotion. He felt stupid, but he began to cry. She had freed him from a nightmare. She saved him from a darkness that had hovered over him for so many years.

"You did it. I am so damn proud of you," Emily whispered emotionally.

She reached out and brushed a tear from his check. He saw that she too was crying and suddenly he didn't feel so stupid.

"Emily, I can never ever repay you for what you've done for me," he said as more tears escaped.

"You don't need to," she began.

"I love you," he suddenly stated. Emily looked at him with surprise. "From the deepest part of my soul, I love you and everything you are. I spent much of my life praying for an angel to save me from this life and my wish has finally been granted."

Emily began to sob. Before Spencer could tell her she didn't need to reciprocate, she threw her arms around his neck and pressed her lips forcefully against his. She pulled back only to reply, "I love you too," before reattaching herself to his mouth.


	14. Chapter 14

_Ok, sorry for the delay! I've been writing, but I haven't had time to check it over and submit it. I also realized that Spencer had a jacked up knee a few chapters back and I forgot lol. So, I'm going to have to go back and fix that at some point … or we are going to just do a bit of a jump and imagine it's healed. I will never do two stories at once again! Too hard to remember which story is which!_

 _Thanks for the support and the comments! You all make this worth it! xoxo_

(xxxxx)

The following day at work, Emily and Spencer couldn't stop shooting glances at one another. Each time a smile would reach their lips and pink would tinge their cheeks. They were careful around the others, keeping their glances and interactions professional. No one knew that not only had they been sleeping together for months, but they both confessed their love for one another only hours earlier.

The quiet day had quickly turned into a long night as they were sent off on a case in Wisconsin. The weather was cold and the snow was piled high. It was difficult to get around in the ice-covered streets. Spencer had stayed behind at the local precinct trying to figure out a comfort zone and potential pattern to the unsubs killing grounds.

Emily and Derek had gone to the ME's office, Rossi and J.J. had gone to the victim's home, while Luke and Hotch had gone to the crime scene. Spencer spun around when he heard stomping of feet behind him.

"Holy shit, it's colder than a witch's tit outside," Derek said as he brushed the snow off his shoulders.

Spencer furrowed his brow in confusion. "What?"

Emily laughed and patted Spencer on the shoulder. "It's just a saying."

Spencer shrugged, still thinking it made no sense, but decided to ignore it. He went back to the board and stared at the multicolor pins looking back at him.

"How's it going, kid?" Derek asked as he tossed his gloves, hat, and scarf onto the table.

"Not great. This unsub is all over the place. I haven't been able to detect a pattern yet and the comfort zone is considerably large," he said as he rubbed his neck.

"I'm going to go grab some coffee, can I get you two a cup?" he asked.

"Yes please!" Emily said as she flopped down into the nearby chair.

"I have one already, thank you," Spencer said not turning from the board.

After Derek shut the door and was presumably far enough away, Emily stood back up and wrapped her arms around Spencer's waist.

"It's so cold," she said burying her head into his back. "I wish we were home in bed, snuggling under the covers."

Spencer turned in her arms and gazed down at her lovingly. Her cheeks and nose were bright red from the bitter cold. Spencer smiled and kissed the tip of her nose.

"You look adorable," he said softly.

"I don't feel adorable. I feel cold," she said sticking out her bottom lip.

Spencer gave her lip a gentle kiss, but she had other ideas. Pulling him down closer she started kissing him more intensely. After a moment, Spencer pulled himself away and stepped back.

"I can't, not here. I don't want us to get caught and God knows once I start I won't want to stop," he said blushing.

"I know, sorry. I'll keep it professional," she said.

Perfect timing too, as the door swung open and Derek entered with the cups of coffee.

(xxxxx)

It was dark and the storm had grown stronger. The threat of a coming blizzard hung in the air. They should've stopped for the night, but they were so close. The unsub was running through the woods and if he got away again he might kill someone. Despite all their concerns, the team separated in search of him.

Emily was running as best as she could through the trees. The wind was howling around her and visibility was becoming increasingly difficult. She stopped and looked around, seeing barely inches in front of her.

"Everyone pull back. It's too dangerous, I want everyone back now," Hotch said over the com-link.

"Copy," Emily said as she looked down to follow her foot prints.

Suddenly she felt something slam into the side of her head. She fell into the snow and tried to reach for her gun, when she felt another blow to her face this time. The unsub and Emily wrestled around on the ground. Each getting punches in.

Emily was kicked hard in the stomach, making her instantly lose her breath. She tried gasping for air as the unsub now sat on her with his hands around her throat. She slapped and clawed at him, but couldn't get a good enough grip.

She searched the ground for something to grab onto. As her vision blurred she finally got a hold of something and swung it hard. The unsub let out a grunt as he moved just enough for Emily to grab her gun and shoot.

(xxxxx)

Spencer came trotting towards the waiting SUV's. Hotch and a few officers stood in a semi-circle talking to one another.

"Head into the cabin over there. We'll be safe for the night," Hotch ordered as he pointed a few yards ahead to a well-lit cabin.

Spencer nodded and raced over. He stepped inside and shook off the snow covering his body. He saw J.J. and Rossi warming up by a fire. An old woman rushed to his side with a steaming cup. She wore a blue house coat and fuzzy pink slippers. Her hair was white as the snow and curled by a perm.

"Oh my dear, you must be freezing. Here, I made cocoa for you. Sit by the fire and warm up," she said handing him the cup.

Spencer nodded and walked over to J.J. and Rossi. Just as he approached them the door opened and Luke walked in. The old woman immediately repeated the process all over again.

"Mrs. Wesselsky. Her husband and she heard about us searching the woods and offered to take us in," Rossi explained.

Spencer nodded and took a sip of his cocoa. It was warm and delicious. He took another sip before sitting down next to J.J.

"Where's Morgan and Emily?" Spencer asked as he placed his cup down on the fire place.

"I don't think they've checked in yet, but both said they received the message and were on their way back," Rossi said.

A few minutes later, Derek arrived. Mrs. Wesselsky sprung into action. Spencer was starting to worry about Emily. He got up and went to the window near the dining room and looked outside. It was impossible to see. He hoped she hadn't gotten lost.

(xxxxx)

Emily rolled over and pushed the unsub off of her. She put her hand to her head and winced at the pain. She looked around for the earpiece for her com-link. She had no way to communicate with the team. Her only chance now was to start walking, but she was disoriented. She didn't know which way to go and the blizzard was making it too difficult to see beyond her stretched out hand.

"Hello! Can anyone here me?" she screamed. "Hotch! Morgan! Hello! Someone help me!"

She realized it was no use at this point. The sound of the wind was too loud and she doubted anyone could hear her cries. She looked at the dead unsub and decided to take his clothing. Bundling up would help her keep warm.

Once she was covered in additional clothing, she moved closer to the nearest tree that gave a small amount of shelter. She sat down and curled up. Trying her best to keep herself as warm as possible. It was proving quite difficult as the storm raged on. She ducked her head into her jacket and tried to relax. She only had a few more hours before the sun came up. She'd be able to figure a way out then.

(xxxxx)

The door to the cabin opened and all attention turned to it. Hotch and two officers came walking in. Spencer looked for Emily to be following them, but she wasn't.

"What's going on? Where's Emily?" he said getting up.

Hotch looked somber, making Spencer's heart drop.

"We've lost contact with her," Hotch began.

"One of our officers heard gun fire, but we couldn't get far enough into the woods to investigate," the detective on the case stated.

"Ok, point out the direction you heard it and we'll start looking," Spencer said as he walked towards them.

"Reid, we can't go out there right now. It's too dangerous," Hotch said.

"So, what? We just leave her out there? What if she's been shot Hotch? We leave her to die?" Spencer said angrily.

"I want to find her as much as you do, but there is no visibility out there right now," Hotch replied.

Spencer looked up at the ceiling as he tried to control his anger. Without another word, he pushed past Hotch and swung the door open. He ran down the porch steps and walked towards the woods. The snow stung his skin as he pushed through the wind. He was already starting to shiver from the bitter cold.

"Emily! Emily! Can you hear me?" he shouted. "Emily!"

"Reid, you need to come back inside," Derek said as he approached Spencer.

"I have to find her Morgan. I can't just leave her out there to die. She needs me," he said as he tried to fight back the tears threatening to fall.

"Emily is a fighter. She won't give up and we'll go search for her the second its morning light," Derek assured him.

Spencer looked helplessly at Derek and turned back to the woods. His heart tearing at the thought of her out there all night alone. She could be dead right now. She could be dying and this was his last chance to save her. How could he just give up and walk away? How could he just go inside and stay warm while she froze to death?

(xxxxx)

Emily sneezed for the eighth time. She looked at her watch and saw she still had two more hours until sunrise. She was now shaking uncontrollably from the cold. She tried getting up to walk around, but she was so tired and her body felt numb. It didn't want to cooperate with her.

She closed her eyes and pictured a warm fire. She was sitting in front of it, drinking a warm cup of coffee. She was taking a sip, just as Spencer sat down behind her. His legs spread around her. She leaned back into his open arms and rested against his chest. He placed warm kisses on top of her head as his arms wrapped tightly around her.

"I love you," he said into her ear.

She smiled at the feeling of his breath on her ear. She felt him holding her tightly. His body pressed against hers. She felt peaceful.

As she began to lose consciousness she whispered, "I love you."

(xxxxx)

Spencer stood on the porch shaking. He refused to go inside to warm up. He said it wasn't fair to Emily and no matter how much threatening Hotch did, he wouldn't budge. As he stared into the white abyss, he heard a sound behind him. Glancing over his shoulder, he saw Rossi walking towards him with a cup in his hand.

"Coffee?" he offered.

"No," Spencer replied curtly.

"Kid, listen, I get what you're doing. I know you care about Emily and it feels wrong to be safe and sound when she isn't, but how is this helping her? How is you risking hypothermia going to save her life?" Rossi said.

Spencer didn't have an answer to that. He knew Rossi was right, but he just couldn't bare it.

"The sun will be rising in another 1 and ½, what good will you be if you are too sick to help? Emily is going to need all of us to find her. You need to get some rest and warm up if you want to be of any use to us," Rossi said.

Spencer slowly turned to look at him.

"What if it's too late?" he said barely above a whisper.

"It might be, but until we know for sure you can't give up. You have to be strong for her. She needs that," Rossi said gently.

Spencer let the words sink in. He nodded his head and reluctantly followed Rossi back into the cabin.

(xxxxx)

"Emily! Emily can you hear me?"

Emily sat up. The sun was shining and most of the snow had melted away, though she still felt cold.

"Spencer! I'm right here!" she called as she struggled to stand up.

Spencer came running into the clearing. He looked terrified and distraught.

"I thought you'd never find me," she sighed as she stood up.

Spencer's lip trembled as he walked slowly toward her. His eyes staring down at the ground. She could see the guilt written all over them.

"I knew you would try, I just didn't know if it would be possible," she amended her words.

He stopped in front of her as tears streamed down his face.

"It's ok, I'm ok," she said holding her arms out for him.

"Emily I'm so sorry," he sobbed as he dropped to his knees.

"Spence, it's not your fau …" she trailed off as she saw him hovering over a body.

It wasn't the unsub's body. She slowly moved around him to get a closer look. There in the snow, completely blue, was her frozen dead body.

(xxxxx)

Spencer and Derek pushed through the woods together. The snow had let up and the sky brightened enough to make it possible to search the woods. Other officers had arrived to assist, as well as a few of the neighbors in the vicinity of the Wesselsky house. The sounds of shouting could be heard echoing off the trees. The snow was a little over ankle high, making it difficult to walk.

"Emily!" Derek called out again as they pushed forward.

They had been walking for quite some distance, making Spencer fear they were on the wrong path. Suddenly, ahead he saw a body huddled under a tree.

"Emily!" he cried as he lifted his legs higher to move faster.

Emily was not responding. She was curled up tightly underneath a black jacket that was covered in snow. Her bottom and legs were buried underneath the snow, as well. Spencer dropped beside her and shook her. She didn't move. He looked helplessly at Derek, who bent down and tilted Emily's head back.

Her head flopped limply to the side as Derek ripped off his glove and placed it to her neck. Spencer watched for a sign that she was still alive.

"She has a pulse. It's weak, but it's there," he said before lifting his wrist to his mouth. "We've got her. She's unconscious, but still breathing."

Spencer brushed the snow away from her and lifted her limp body into his arms. They made the long walk back to the entrance of the woods where the ambulance was waiting for them.


	15. Chapter 15

_Sorry for the long wait on an update! Life has been incredibly busy lately – for once it's for the good! I hope to wrap this story up in the next few chapters or so. I already have a new story in mind, but I refuse to start until I'm done with this one. I will never do two stories at once again!_

 _Thanks for the support and the comments! You all make this worth it! xoxo_

(xxxxx)

It had been a scary 14 hours at the hospital. The doctor informed Hotch that Emily had to be revived twice during the ride to the emergency room, but she was stable. Despite being in pre-hypothermia stages, her body had no permanent damage. She did suffer one major injury, but he did not discuss this with the team.

Everyone was anxious to speak with her, but they were told that Emily was refusing visitors. Spencer's heart was broken that she didn't want to see him. He needed to see her. It physically hurt to be away from her. He needed to see that she was alive and well. Why wouldn't she let him in?

"Why is she avoiding us?" Penelope said with irritation.

She was leaning over in her chair, talking in a whisper to Spencer and Derek.

"I don't know, baby girl. Hotch said she suffered an injury. Maybe she's in a lot of pain and not up for chatter," Derek suggested.

"So, we don't stay, we just give her a hug and leave. I need to see her," she pouted.

"It's her choice, Garcia," Derek replied.

"Well, her choice stinks and I think we should sneak in and see her anyway," she said.

"That's not a good idea," he said.

"Yea, well, I don't care. I'm going to see her," Penelope said as she got out of her chair and walked to the nurse's desk. "Excuse me, ma'am?"

The nurse walked over and smiled at Penelope.

"Hi, I was wondering if you would be able get me a blanket? We've been here a while and it's rather cold. I don't want to end up sick," she asked sweetly.

The nurse nodded and walked off to find something for Penelope. She looked back at Derek and Spencer who were watching her.

"You two coming or what?" she said.

Spencer jumped up and went after her, while Derek reluctantly followed. They hurried down the hallway, glancing back every once in a while, hoping the nurse hadn't discovered them missing. When they got to Emily's room, they slowly opened the door and peered in. The room was dark and Emily's back was to them. From the movement of her body and the small sounds of sniffles, they could tell she was crying.

"Em?" Penelope said gently.

They saw her body freeze and she stopped making noise. They saw her hand go to her face and assumed she was wiping away the tears.

"What are you doing here?" her angry voice bellowed.

"I'm sorry, but I had to see you. I was so scared for you and you can't just not let us see you," Penelope defended.

"I said I didn't want any visitors! I want to be left alone!" Emily snapped.

"I … I'm sorry," Penelope stuttered.

"Emily, I know you are hurting, but we care about you. We just needed to see that you were alright," Derek tried.

Emily sat up in the bed and turned to face them. Her face swollen from crying.

"I'm fine! See? I'm alive and I'm well! Now go!" she shouted.

They all stared at her in shock. Emily had never acted like this before. Was she mad that they hadn't saved her immediately? Did she think that they had abandoned her?

"Emily, we tried to get to you," Derek started.

"This isn't about you Derek! It isn't about you at all! So, please …" she began to sob. "Go!"

With that the door to the room flew open and Hotch stormed in with the nurse.

"What are you doing in here? I told you no visitors," the nurse said angrily.

Hotch was glaring at them. They had been busted. Derek and Penelope turned and walked out of the room, but Spencer kept looking at Emily. He was aching to go to her side and hold her. To take away whatever was hurting her.

"Emily," he said softly.

She refused to look at him, which pained him even more. She turned her back on him and curled into a ball.

"Spencer, go," she said before sobbing again.

Spencer waited another second before turning and leaving the room as well. Hotch followed him down the hallway, not saying anything. When they reached the lobby, Spencer sat down heavily and waited for the reprimand he knew was coming.

"I thought I made it clear that Emily asked for no visitors?" Hotch said.

"Sir, I'm sorry. I just needed to see her. To make sure she was alright," Penelope said with tears in her eyes.

"It doesn't matter what you want right now. It's what Emily wanted and you blatantly disregarded her feelings," Hotch stated.

"Hotch, come on man, what's going on? I've never seen her like that before. I've seen her take some beatings and bullets and she's never cried like that," Derek said eyeing Hotch out.

Spencer was listening intently.

"And why is she so mad at us? What did we do so we can fix it?" Penelope asked with a trembling lip.

Hotch looked from the two before sighing.

"Look, this honestly has nothing to do with any of us," he stated.

"So, then what is the hostility all about?" Derek asked.

"I can't give out that information. What I can tell you is that she found out some news that was upsetting and she wants to deal with it alone," he replied.

Derek looked at Penelope, who looked back at him.

"What kind of news would you find out that would have you that distressed?" Penelope said furrowing her brow.

Hotch didn't respond, he just stared at her with a blank expression.

"Is she dying? Is she sick?" Penelope cried.

"No, she's not dying or sick," Hotch replied.

"Only thing I can think of is someone dying, but only person who died was the unsub," Penelope replied.

"Guys, knock it off. Just let it be," Hotch said.

"Pregnant."

Hotch, Derek, and Penelope turned to Spencer who looked at Hotch with wide eyes. His voice had barely been over a whisper.

"Emily was pregnant?" Penelope said before turning her attention back to Hotch.

Hotch was staring hard at Spencer.

"She lost a baby?" Penelope said in shock.

Hotch looked away from Spencer to Penelope. His frown had grown deeper.

"Oh my God," Penelope replied as she placed her hand over her heart. "Oh, oh Emily."

"Hotch is that true? Emily was pregnant and lost the baby?" Derek asked.

Hotch seemed to be considering his words.

"Why was she in the field? Why didn't we know about it?" Derek said with a hint of anger.

"I didn't know about it. As far as I can tell, no one knew about this," Hotch replied.

Suddenly, Spencer stood up from his chair and ran from the lobby towards the exit, slamming the door shut on his way out. It hit Derek like a ton of bricks.

"Shit!" he said before running from the hospital after him.

He searched the parking lot, but couldn't find Spencer. Penelope and Hotch ran up behind him.

"What's going on?" Hotch asked.

"We need to find him! I'll explain everything on the way," Derek said as he flipped open his phone.

(xxxxx)

Spencer heard the pounding on his door. He sat in the bathroom with his back against the door. He looked down at the blood pouring from his hand and the shattered glass around him. Tears streamed down his face as he heard his door being opened.

(xxxxx)

"Reid open the door!" Derek hollered as he pounded his fist on the door.

"Spencer, please open up! We need to know you are alright," Penelope called. "Where is J.J.?"

They had called her and asked her to bring over her spare key to let them in. Only seconds later the sound of feet running up the wooden stairs could be heard. J.J appeared at the top of the stairs and held out her keys to Derek who snatched them.

"What's going on? Is he alright?" she asked confused.

"We don't know," Penelope said nervously.

Derek unlocked the door and swung it open. They hurried in to see the house in shambles. His books were thrown around the room, papers littered the ground, wood chips surrounded the floor where an end table had been smashed.

"What the hell is going on?" J.J. asked full of concern.

"Reid? Reid?" Derek called out as he headed for the bedroom, which was equally trashed.

They heard him pounding on the bathroom door.

"Open up? Reid? Open the damn door or I'll kick it down!" Derek yelled.

Penelope walked next to him and placed her hand gently on the door.

"Reid, please, you are scaring us," she whimpered.

"Please leave me alone," Spencer replied with a broken voice.

The sound of his soft crying could be heard through the door. Penelope couldn't hold back any longer and began crying as well. Derek immediately wrapped her in a hug. J.J. looked at Hotch with questioning eyes. He gestured for her to follow him.

"What's going on?" she asked when they reached the living room.

"Emily suffered a miscarriage," Hotch stated bluntly.

J.J.'s hand shot to her mouth and she gasped. "Oh Emily," she whispered.

She let it sink in, but furrowed her brow a moment later.

"But why is Spence this upset?" she said.

Hotch stared at her. J.J.'s eyes wandered as she tried to understand what was going on.

"Does he think it's his fault? There was nothing we could do," she said still confused.

"It was his."

J.J. spun to see Derek standing in the doorway, with Penelope still snuggled into his side. Her head lay on his shoulder as his arm wrapped around her.

"What?" J.J. said. "What was his?"

Derek didn't reply as Penelope burst into tears again. J.J. looked at Derek and then back at Hotch. Her eyes grew wider and her mouth dropped open.

"The baby?" she said as she felt her heart skip a beat.

No one responded.

"But … Emily … and Spence?" she said in shock.

"I'm the only one who knew about it," Derek replied.

"How long?" J.J. gasped.

"It's been a while. I'd guess nearly a year," he said.

J.J. blinked in stunned silence. She couldn't believe that her best friends were dating and she hadn't noticed.

"They hid it well," Derek said. "I knew about it and often forgot."

"So, what do we do?" Penelope sniffled.

"I don't think there's much we can do, other than be there for them," Derek replied.

"I'll stay here for a while," J.J. offered immediately.

"Me too. Baby girl, why don't you go back to the hospital and wait for Emily," Derek suggested.

Penelope nodded.

"I'll go with you," Hotch stated.

The two of them headed out the door, leaving J.J. and Derek behind.

"You wanna clean up a bit?" Derek suggested.

J.J. nodded and the two began straightening up the living room, while they let for Spencer grieve privately.


	16. Chapter 16

_Thanks for the support and the comments! You all make this worth it! xoxo_

(xxxxx)

Emily stared at the window as light slowly seeped through the blinds. She hadn't slept much the previous night. Every time she fell asleep, she would have nightmares. In some the baby was crying for her and she couldn't help. Some were dreams of Spencer yelling at her for letting their child die. She was so ashamed and so guilt-ridden.

The door to her room opened and she sighed. The nurses had been in and out all night checking her vitals. She was told if all went well through the night, she would be released sometime by the afternoon the following day. To her surprise, it wasn't a nurse or doctor after all.

"Em?"

It was J.J. She really didn't want to talk to anyone. She just wanted to be left alone. She didn't deserve sympathy. She had such a strong self-hate at the moment, the last thing she wanted was friends around telling her how sorry they were.

"I know you don't want to talk and you want to be left alone," J.J. began softly. "I just thought you should know that I know how you feel. A few years ago, when I was on assignment with Matt Cruz, I found out I was pregnant."

Emily listened quietly, but didn't turn to acknowledge her.

"I should have left as soon as I found this news out, but I stayed. I chose to stay in harm's way and during an ambush where our vehicle exploded, I lost the baby. I hated myself. That innocent child I was supposed to protect was dead because of me," she said as tears slid down her cheeks at the memory.

Emily finally turned around. Her eyes shimmering with tears of understanding.

"It took me a long time to forgive myself Emily. I had to go through a great deal of therapy to deal with the fact that it wasn't my fault that I lost my child. I also had to believe that Will didn't hate me either. I had to trust that he loved me enough to forgive me for what happened," J.J. said as she sat on the bed next to Emily.

Emily had no words. All she could do was throw herself into J.J.'s arms and let out all of her pain.

(xxxxx)

Derek yawned as he poured himself another cup of coffee. He was filling it with creamer when Luke entered the kitchen.

"Hey man, go take a rest. I'll take over," he said.

"She finally fall asleep?" Derek asked as he put the creamer away.

"Yea, about 15 minutes ago," Luke replied as he stole Derek's coffee.

"Well, Reid's still awake and against the door. J.J. texted and said Emily is filling out release papers. She's going to bring Emily by here on the way home to see if she can get him to come out," Derek said as he yawned again.

"Alright, well get some rest. I'll come get you when they get here," Luke said patting Derek on the back.

(xxxxx)

About two hours later, the door to Spencer's apartment opened and J.J. walked in. Luke and a, now awake, Penelope rushed to her.

"Where's Emily?" Penelope asked.

"She's outside the door, but she wants us to leave. She doesn't want company and doubts Spencer will either," J.J. said.

Penelope frowned.

"You could use more rest anyway. Come on, I'll give you a ride home," Luke said as he draped his arm over her shoulders.

"Fine, but I'm not happy about this," Penelope pouted.

"Let me go get Morgan," Luke said before rushing to the guest room.

Within five minutes they were heading out the door. They all glanced at Emily hoping to at least give her a comforting smile, but she kept her head towards the ground. Her hair made a shield around her face. J.J. gave Emily a hug and told her to call if she needed her before leaving with the rest of the group.

Emily looked around the room after she shut the door. There were a few pieces of furniture missing and some dents in the floor and wall. She figured he must have thrown some things around in anger. She slowly shuffled to his bedroom and stared at the bathroom door. She could see his shadow leaning against the other side.

"Spence," she said barely above a whisper.

She saw the shadow move and the door opened. The bags under his eyes were practically black from lack of sleep and the amount of crying he'd endured. His shirt and pants were covered in dried blood. She saw his hand had been wrapped with gauze. She couldn't bear to look at him. Her heart constricted and tears poured from her eyes.

"I didn't know. I didn't know and I'm sorry. I'm so sorry," she sobbed before throwing herself into his arms.

"Emily no, it's my fault. I should have found you. I'm sorry," he said as he cried with her.

They held each other tightly, both crying harder than either could remember crying. At some point they found themselves on the floor holding one another completely exhausted.

"I'm sorry Emily. I should have taken better care of you. I shouldn't have left you out there alone. Please forgive me," Spencer said, when he finally found his voice.

"Spencer, there was no way you could've gotten to me. I couldn't see an inch in front of me. You could've gotten lost and died out there," Emily replied as she placed her forehead against his.

"But you needed me and I let you down," he said as fresh tears streamed.

"No, baby, no," Emily said placing her hands on his cheeks. "You did the best you could. I know you would've come for me if you could."

"I tried! I did try!" he sobbed.

"I know. I know you did," she said as she broke down again.

The two held each other crying for the second time. Both expressing their immense guilt and grief through tears.

"I need you Spencer. I need you so bad. Please don't leave me," Emily suddenly blurted.

"I would never leave you. Ever," he said before pressing his lips to hers.

They kissed greedily. There was no sexual intention behind the kiss. It was pure fear, hurt, and desperation for comfort. After a few moments, Spencer pulled Emily tighter into his arms.

"We'll get through this. I promise I will be there for you in every possible way. You won't do this alone," he said as he kissed the top of her head.

Emily nodded as she snuggled into his chest. While her pain hadn't subsided, her fear of losing Spencer had disappeared. He was grieving as badly as she was, but he didn't blame her. For that she was incredibly relieved and grateful.

(xxxxx)

It took a while for things to go back to normal. As normal as possible, that is. Spencer often found Emily staring off into space, sometimes crying. She was always a reserved person, but she became even more guarded after all of this.

Hotch never mentioned concerns about the two of them dating. Spencer assumed it had to do with the loss of the baby and the fact that they'd hidden their relationship well for the past year. Emily returned to work after agreeing to go to counseling once a week for the next three months.

Surprisingly, she never complained about it and never talked about how her sessions went. Within a month, she was cleared to return to the field. After her first case back, the team decided to have a welcome back dinner at Rossi's. Sometime during the evening, Spencer noticed Emily was missing.

He found her in the backyard on a wooden swing surrounded by a lush garden. She was swinging back and forth, the light spring breeze blowing her hair.

"May I join you?" Spencer asked as he stepped up behind her.

Emily gave him a small smile and nodded. He sat down next to her and they swung silently for a few minutes.

"Do you ever think it's possible that some people's lives are destined to be filled with heartbreak? Like maybe we did something in the past life, so this time around we are being punished?" she asked as she stared at the stars.

"No, I don't. I think we all have our trials and tribulations. Some just experience it worse than others, but I don't think that's a punishment. I think it's just a random part of life," Spencer replied.

"I feel like I lost the baby because when I was given a child at 16 I chose to have an abortion," she said softly. Her voice cracking.

"Emily, you made a decision back then that was more or less forced on you because of your Mom. You were young and scared and not capable of taking care of a baby. You are not being punished for doing what you thought was right," he said grabbing her hand and linking their fingers together.

Emily placed her free hand on her stomach and looked down.

"It's weird. I didn't even know the baby … and I miss them," she whispered.

"Yea," Spencer agreed.

He watched her a moment longer before asking her what had been weighing on his mind.

"You wouldn't be opposed to having a child … with me?" he asked nervously.

Emily looked at him a moment before looking back down at her belly.

"No, I wouldn't be opposed. In fact, I never realized how much I wanted it until I lost it," she said.

Despite himself, a smile stretched across his face. Spencer scooted closer to her and wrapped his arms around her shoulder. He placed a kiss to the top of her head as she curled into him.

"Well, what if, when you feel the time is right, we try again?" he said gently.

Emily was quiet, but she stayed comfortably snuggled in his arms.

"Ok," she said finally.

"Ok," Spencer repeated with a smile.


	17. Chapter 17

_Ahowell: I imagine that Maeve did happen. I just throw Luke in because I love his character and he fits so well with the team._

 _I hope you enjoyed! xoxo_

(xxxxx)

2 years later …

It was a beautiful fall day. The wind was enough to give you a slight chill, but the sun was warm enough that it was fun being outside. Derek and Henry were chasing Jack who carried a football, while Luke tried to block for him. J.J. was pushing Michael on the swing, while she talked to Penelope.

Spencer stood by the field watching the boys play football, while he talked with Hotch and Rossi. Suddenly a little girl with messy brown curls came racing by. Spencer sprang into action and ran after her.

"Whoa, whoa, whoa. Not so fast, missy," he said as he scooped her up. "You are too little to play football."

She let out a squeal of anger and began to squirm in his arms.

"Nooooo, downnnnnnn!" she screamed as little tears slid down her chubby cheeks.

"Awe, it's her birthday. If she wants to play football, let her," Derek said as he ran over and handed her the ball.

Spencer put her down and she cradled the ball in her arms.

"Run Lilly! We're gonna get you!" Henry said playfully, making the toddler scream and run.

Luke picked her up and ran as the boys chased the two of them. Lilly laughed so hard she could barely breath. Spencer stood by smiling when hands wrapped around his waist.

"It's almost time for cake," Emily said as she rested her chin on his shoulder.

"I could go for some dessert," he said turning around in her arms.

"That's for later when the birthday girl goes to sleep," Emily teased as she placed a kiss to his lips.

"I like these birthday parties you throw. Lilly gets presents and so does daddy," he grinned.

Emily giggled and slapped him playfully on his butt.

"Go get the birthday girl and let's have some cake," she said as she walked away.

Spencer laughed and ran off to get their daughter. Emily stopped and watched as he chased the giggling toddler around the field. In her wildest dreams, she never would've seen herself as a mother and certainly, never saw herself married to Spencer. Funny how different her life turned out to be.


End file.
